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October 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my husband and I were talking about celebrities he finds attractive. All of these beautiful, talented, glamorous women were starting to make me feel very plain, so he attempted to console me by saying, "But I love you. You're attainable!" FML

#20926020
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40106) - you deserved it (5705)

On 10/19/2013 at 3:30am - love - by AchievementUnlocked? - United States

Today, the family upstairs decided to play basketball. Indoors. At 3am. FML

#20928702
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38936) - you deserved it (2639)

On 10/21/2013 at 9:06am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my purse was stolen from my bag while I was on the train. The thief will be surprised to find that it wasn't my money purse, but in fact my "period purse". Hope they find tampons useful. FML

#20906908
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47006) - you deserved it (3962)

On 10/04/2013 at 5:39am - misc - by haveahappyperiod (woman) -

Today, a few of my friends arranged for us to go skinny-dipping with the guy I really like. It went really well, until a turd surfaced before our eyes. After we scrambled out of the pool in panic, my crush called us all freaks and left. FML

#20927673
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37696) - you deserved it (4776)

On 10/20/2013 at 3:56pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my mom started getting ready for the Rapture. FML

#20906662
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31109) - you deserved it (2474)

On 10/03/2013 at 11:36pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I found out that my phone fits perfectly through the slot between the elevator and the floor. FML

#20921212
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45382) - you deserved it (4196)

On 10/15/2013 at 2:37am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was cuddling my new boyfriend, when he went in to kiss me for the first time. Sadly, I reflexively kneed him in the balls. FML

#20917814
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37814) - you deserved it (11575)

On 10/12/2013 at 4:28pm - love - by fuck.jpg.bmp.gif.rar.zip.shit (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend at a dinner with our two families. Not only did she flatly reject me, my dad said, "Good call. He's not ready." FML

#20921216
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45259) - you deserved it (5962)

On 10/15/2013 at 2:49am - love - by notready (man) - Australia

Today, someone popped my birthday balloon at school. Her reasoning was that she "didn't want people to know we have the same birthday." Who popped it? My identical twin sister. FML

#20934033
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45164) - you deserved it (2850)

On 10/25/2013 at 11:03pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, my paranoia got so bad that I had to physically restrain myself from aggressively confronting the kid walking behind me on the sidewalk. FML

#20909154
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32668) - you deserved it (5280)

On 10/06/2013 at 1:29am - health - by Angrily Paranoid (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was pushed off of a glacier by a very angry tourist. Why? I work as a glacier guide, and apparently some people find it overly frustrating to be informed that there isn't a café on the glacier. FML

#20924969
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43090) - you deserved it (2330)

On 10/18/2013 at 8:40am - work - by Quasimodo (woman) - Norway (Hordaland)

Today, while visiting my mother, she asked my son who his favorite parent was. As a growing boy, he chose his father. I don't mind, except she then asked, "So, whose side are you taking in the divorce?" My husband and I have no marital issues. My son refuses to believe us. FML

#20932049
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39147) - you deserved it (2679)

On 10/24/2013 at 2:05am - kids - by he's still not convinced (woman) - United States

Today, a friend thought it would be funny to shove me over; I faceplanted. I was going to say "F*ck you" and "I will kill you". It came out as "I will f*ck you." He's still laughing. FML

#20910543
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40809) - you deserved it (6796)

On 10/07/2013 at 2:11am - misc - by Ashley - United States (California)



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