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August 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I confessed my feelings to the guy I've had the biggest crush on. He spent the next ten minutes calling me delusional, said that I know nothing about him, and laughed that "this isn't Twilight, for fuck's sake". All he did when I started crying was pat me on the head and leave. FML

#20826991
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50989) - you deserved it (8913)

On 08/08/2013 at 8:54am - love - by names suck and so do I (woman) - United Kingdom (Oxfordshire)

Today, my 14-year-old daughter convinced my son that when he was born, he was actually born as a girl, but we wanted a boy so bad we had his gender changed. Now he wants to change back to a girl because now he doesn't feel right as a boy. Last year, she got her other brother to cross dress. FML

#20832766
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45675) - you deserved it (4786)

On 08/11/2013 at 8:58pm - kids - by mydaughterisdisturbed - United States (Indiana)

Today, in the middle of examining me, my gynecologist suddenly took a sharp intake of breath and vomited on the floor. FML

#20826932
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54401) - you deserved it (15245)

On 08/08/2013 at 7:10am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Latvia (Jelgavas)

Today, I discovered that my wife named our kids after her former lovers. We have two sons and a daughter. FML

#20819538
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46764) - you deserved it (4663)

On 08/03/2013 at 11:29pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Delaware)

Today, I did something I'd always wanted to do: I went swimming with dolphins. It was really fun, until I went to kiss the dolphin, and she slipped her tongue half into my mouth. FML

#20849713
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41071) - you deserved it (13189)

On 08/22/2013 at 6:45pm - animals - by violated ._. (woman) - United States

Today, I went to get my hair done. The hairdresser managed to catch my eyebrow piercing in his comb and almost rip it out. I now look like I have a gunshot wound on the upper right hand side of my face. I'm getting married in a matter of hours, and I still had to pay £100 for the hair cut. FML

#20831030
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39324) - you deserved it (12441)

On 08/10/2013 at 5:55pm - misc - by ouchbrow (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, half-way through my trip to Florida, I received a call from my friend of six years. "I sort of had sex with your girlfriend while you were gone." He said it "just sort of happened." FML

#20855295
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50585) - you deserved it (3388)

On 08/26/2013 at 4:17pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, my dad, under threats of disowning me, insisted that I offer my sister a job in my company. I run my own law firm, she is a hairdresser. FML

#20838513
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47729) - you deserved it (3023)

On 08/15/2013 at 9:34am - work - by lawman (man) - Denmark (Hovedstaden)

Today, was my wedding day. We had a beautiful outdoor wedding and everything was going perfectly as planned. That is, until a bird flew over us and left a present right between my boobs. I had to stand at the altar for 30 minutes as bird poop melted in my cleavage. FML

#20837089
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53419) - you deserved it (4844)

On 08/14/2013 at 1:39pm - misc - by NewBride (woman) - United States (Nebraska)

Today, my 12-year-old son was shot in the foot. After hours of not talking, including to the police, he finally told us that his friend accidentally shot him with his dad's gun, and that he didn't want to say anything because he didn't want to "lose any street cred by snitching." FML

#20836449
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48435) - you deserved it (5938)

On 08/14/2013 at 12:26am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, while cleaning my ears with Q-tips, I came in my pants. FML

#20835942
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45694) - you deserved it (16288)

On 08/13/2013 at 7:53pm - intimacy - by ANON (man) - United States (California)

Today, my sister announced that she and her boyfriend are getting married. Her boyfriend is my husband. We're not even legally divorced yet. FML

#20857902
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60338) - you deserved it (3572)

On 08/28/2013 at 1:47pm - love - by still together (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I came home a little earlier than usual, only to walk in on my dad frantically trying to remove a ballgag from my mom's mouth. FML

#20822450
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47641) - you deserved it (4304)

On 08/05/2013 at 5:42pm - misc - by NO NO NO (woman) - Netherlands (Zuid-Holland)



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