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June 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I heard my husband telling his friend that I used to be a skank and was "easier than 1 plus 1" when we first met. I was still a virgin when we got married. FML

Today, after years of training and competing, I realized that the universe does not want me to play the piano. Not only do I have hands that can fit in toddler-sized gloves, my carpal tunnel is already to the point where I have to wear a brace at night, at the ripe old age of 14. FML

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me for not remembering our anniversary. Our three week anniversary. FML

#20702606
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56055) - you deserved it (6590)

On 06/03/2013 at 12:31am - love - by BadBoyfriend - United States (Texas)

Today, my mom cut off the legs of all my pants, because she says I don't show enough skin for guys. I'm now forced to wear jaggedly cut shorts that barely cover my thighs until I can buy new ones. FML

#20739324
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47428) - you deserved it (4678)

On 06/21/2013 at 4:27pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, while I was working the drive-thru, a couple came through. As I was handing back their change they began giggling. I looked down to see the man's sex-nose fully erect. FML

#20748724
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38750) - you deserved it (4218)

On 06/26/2013 at 4:33pm - intimacy - by theunluckylifeofme (woman) - United States (California)

Today, someone came into the store I work at, laughed at my name on my name-tag, and left without even buying anything. FML

#20747987
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33624) - you deserved it (3111)

On 06/26/2013 at 5:07am - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, a group of friends and I went out to a fancy club together. The doorman checked us out and let everyone in. Everyone except me, that is. The doorman's reason: "Her face looks like a baboon's arse." My "friends" all went in anyway, leaving me to walk all the way home. FML

#20753013
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46902) - you deserved it (4214)

On 06/28/2013 at 7:22pm - misc - by arse-face (woman) - Ireland (Clare)

Today, I have pink eye in both eyes, the stomach virus, and a cold. I'm also sitting at work because my boss "doesn't believe in sick days." FML

#20735203
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49758) - you deserved it (3191)

On 06/19/2013 at 1:23pm - health - by sicksicksick - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was lectured by a self-professed vegan over my "barbaric" eating habits, in between her scarfing down a tuna fish sandwich. FML

#20727332
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32022) - you deserved it (2086)

On 06/15/2013 at 12:13pm - misc - by fuckedbyahipster (man) - Finland

Today, after spending four hours cooking food for a special family dinner, I went to take a shower before they arrived. I came back out less than twenty minutes later to find most of the food gone, and a very guilty-looking puppy. FML

Today, while at my aunt's funeral, my grandma who has terrible memory loss asked me whose funeral we were at. I had to explain to her that her daughter had died. FML

#20702720
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (77803) - you deserved it (3223)

On 06/03/2013 at 1:32am - misc - by Me - United States (Illinois)

Today, I found out that my parents were artists when they met. My mom said that I was one of their best projects yet. My sister, hearing what my mother said, broke my week-old PS3 in a rage. FML

#20699851
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43327) - you deserved it (2859)

On 06/01/2013 at 7:31pm - misc - by H1dd3n (man) - United States (California)

Today, at my job at my tattoo parlor, yet another client offered to pay for his tattoo by "letting" me sleep with him. This client happens to be my boyfriend's best friend, whose girlfriend is having me tattoo his name on her wrist next week. FML

#20735377
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47926) - you deserved it (3531)

On 06/19/2013 at 2:46pm - work - by notkatvond (woman) - United States



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