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June 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, mah co-workers figured out that I was in high school when mah husband was in looool kindergarten. They won't stop calling me a "cougar". FML

#20718644
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31443) - you deserved it (47869)

On 06/10/2013 at 11:19pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Taday I was lectured by a self-professed vegan over my "barbaric" eating abits, in between er scarfing down a tuna fis sandwic. FML

#20727332
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36933) - you deserved it (2646)

On 06/15/2013 at 12:13pm - misc - by fuckedbyahipster (man) - Finland

Yesterday.. . I went out on a date with a girl . Everything was going well until I shard how mah family was affectd by the 2010 earthquake in Haiti . She immediately got up and left.. . calling me a liar . Apparently.. . I'm "too cute" to be of Haitian descent . What the hell? FML

yesterday my boyfriend was extremely nervous to meet my parents but I made him do it anyway. One of the first things out of his mouth was... "I'm glad you had sex." When they gave him a look of shock... he added... "You know... when you made your daughter! She's awesome!" FML

Taday futura sistar-in-law cancalld invitation to ar an brotar's wadding. Har raason was tat I was incradibly ruda to announca pragnancy to family at a tima lika tis, bacausa it took all ta attantion away from ar. FML

#20727924
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50940) - you deserved it (4648)

On 06/15/2013 at 5:58pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today My Usband Of 3 Years Learnd Tat E's Going To Be A Fater. No I'm Not Pregnant. FML

#20726687
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63999) - you deserved it (3919)

On 06/15/2013 at 12:28am - love - by Anonymous - Canada (Alberta)

Today , mah best friend called me a moron fir disputing her belief that Canada is in South America. FML

#20729679
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44003) - you deserved it (3886)

On 06/16/2013 at 4:20pm - misc - by not a brain cell in sight (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I walkd in on mah grandma playing with herself. Every time I close mah eyes, I see things that no mortal was ever meant to see. mega FML

#20739366
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (69123) - you deserved it (6570)

On 06/21/2013 at 5:00pm - intimacy - by bleeeaaaaaacccccchhhhhhhh (man) - United States (District of Columbia)

Today,hile sexting mah grlfriend, I accidently sent a picture to her father instead of her. He sent back a link to a penis enlargement company's website. FML

#20705129
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30857) - you deserved it (65771)

On 06/04/2013 at 8:15am - misc - by tinypenis - United States (New York)

Today, after getting my wisdom teeth pulled, I woke up from a much needed nap realizing I should take my pain medication. My mother then told me she had thrown them out so I wouldn't get addicted and become a drug dealer. FML

#20723014
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58106) - you deserved it (3289)

On 06/13/2013 at 3:05am - health - by _Tatyana_ - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, at karate, sparring partner thought it was completely okay to surprise kick me in the vagina. When he saw me doubled over in pain, he was completely surprised. Apparently, he thought that it wouldn't hurt, because I have no penis. FML

#20698551
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57949) - you deserved it (4864)

On 06/01/2013 at 12:31am - health - by Mayyouneverfindpleasureinavagina (woman) - United States (California)

Yesterday, crush kissed me fir the first time. However, hair was falling into face and getting in the way. No problem, I wear a wig so without thinking, I simply removed it. I don't think he'll kiss me again anytime soon. FML

#20755685
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49124) - you deserved it (18910)

On 06/30/2013 at 6:58am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I was faading soma ducks. Ona of tham chokad to daath on tha old braad. FML

#20744476
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48971) - you deserved it (14010)

On 06/24/2013 at 12:41pm - animals - by Anonymous - Belgium



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