Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

FML with : on the way b

Number of results : 15

Today, I got an expensive return bus ticket to visit my family 200 miles away. I accidentally tore the ticket when taking it from the machine, but the driver said not to worry, as it would still be accepted on the way back. Guess who's still 200 miles from home. FML

#21386064
27 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25494) - you deserved it (2090)

On 04/01/2015 at 7:24pm - misc - by dumbbus - United Kingdom (Stockton-on-Tees)

Today, I was walking my dog when he stopped in the middle of the street and took a dump. I looked around furtively but saw nobody, so I just kept walking. I stepped in it on the way back home. FML

#20558609
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10378) - you deserved it (88461) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 03/24/2013 at 7:01pm - animals - by BaliTheDog - France

Today, I was caught "experimenting" with my friend at his house. His parents called mine, and my dad came to drive me home. On the way back, he tried to cheer me up by saying, "Son, don't be ashamed. When I was your age, I sucked a few dicks myself." Thanks for the info, Dad. FML

#20539287
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49778) - you deserved it (24554)

On 03/11/2013 at 7:33am - intimacy - by ugh (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I had awful morning sickness, and I asked my husband if he'd get me a drink while I went to the bathroom. On the way back, I witnessed him spitting in the glass. FML

#20165918
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32694) - you deserved it (2596)

On 11/16/2012 at 9:00pm - love - by akiza (woman) - Japan

Today, I tripped on the way back from collecting a prize in front of 600 students and their parents. I got more applause than I did when collecting the prize. FML

#19877317
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18945) - you deserved it (1936)

On 07/01/2012 at 7:03pm - misc - by plzdontclapme -

Today, my history teacher confiscated my iPhone. She dropped it on the way back to her desk, and I now have a shattered iPhone screen to fix. FML

#19233379
434 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29193) - you deserved it (29661)

On 03/07/2012 at 2:25pm - misc - by sad face - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I went out in a storm to collect my wheelie bin, which had flown down the street. On the way back to my house, I realised my door had slammed shut and locked behind me. That's okay though, a trampoline decided to smash my window and let me in. FML

Today, while going to work, I was mugged. On the way back, I was mugged. FML

#14549373
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39871) - you deserved it (3400)

On 01/11/2011 at 11:04pm - money - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was on a crowded bus on the way back from my boyfriend's when I suddenly had a terrible nose bleed. I had no tissues, so instead I had to use last night's underwear from my bag. FML

#14366968
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26426) - you deserved it (4988)

On 12/28/2010 at 5:47am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I got a $200 bonus at work and was super excited about getting a plane ticket to see my family. On the way back from work I got a $300 speeding ticket. FML

#13450505
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10747) - you deserved it (39177)

On 10/14/2010 at 8:43pm - money - by copmagnet - United States

Today, I was on a first date with this girl I've been talking to. I met her and she came with me so I could park my car in the student lot. On the way back, I saw a beat up car with its window duct taped up and exclaimed "Haha! Look at that piece of junk." It was her car. FML

#6839126
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6768) - you deserved it (32893)

On 12/20/2009 at 12:04am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Maryland)

Today, when I got to work, I found out that I was being laid off. Two hours later, I found out my boss had my name on the wrong list. I was elated. I went to lunch, and on the way back was rear ended in the rain. I was an hour and a half late getting back to work. I was fired upon returning. FML

#5568321
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37528) - you deserved it (2720)

On 09/30/2009 at 5:04pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I went to the mall and saw a really cute guy. I acted all cool and started doing a sexy hair flip. On the way back up from my hair flip I hit my head on a cellphone stand. FML

#4203484
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8449) - you deserved it (54173)

On 08/01/2009 at 8:56am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I rode in the cab on the way back to my dorm from the airport. The taxi driver was on the phone and not really paying attention. I paid him and got out of the cab, but he drove away before I could get my luggage out of the trunk. FML

#355995
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (70891) - you deserved it (5025)

On 03/15/2009 at 8:49pm - misc - by Noname (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I got to Costa Rica for my first vacation in five years. I immediately rented a scooter for the week after checking into my prepaid, no refunds, hotel. On the way back from the rental agency I hit a pothole and broke my leg and ripped the skin off my foot. I'm flying home tomorrow. FML

#91860
27 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43629) - you deserved it (3734)

On 02/20/2009 at 9:20pm - misc - by Dale (man) - Costa Rica (San Jose)



FML's blog

  • Tania's illustrated FML
  • Hi gang! How are you all doing? This week has been quite eventful for some people. Uber has been causing taxi drivers here and there to get their knickers in a twist, notable over here in France, which caused…

Friday 26 June 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: