FML with : emo_

Number of results : 572

Today, my mom called me in a panic because someone had hacked my phone and was sending her evil faces. They were emojis I'd accidentally butt-dialed. FML

by Anonymous / 05/01/2016 at 9:07pm / United States (Indiana) / Miscellaneous

Today, I have an infected piercing because I'm allergic to the metal. My ear is so swollen that I can't remove the jewelry. It won't get better until I'm able to remove the jewelry. FML

by pierced / 05/01/2016 at 1:56pm / United States (Texas) / Health

Today, and the 4 months preceding it, my neighbors had been remodeling their house, which meant jackhammer noises every morning. The one day they take a break, my other neighbor decides to start a remodeling project. It'll only be two more months of this. FML

by Anonymous / 03/22/2016 at 2:37pm / Puerto Rico / Miscellaneous

Today, my cat brought home a bloody, barely-living mouse. The thing managed to escape and dragged itself into a crack in the wall, where it must have died. The only way to get it out before it starts to stink up the place is by demolishing the wall. FML

by Anonymous / 03/20/2016 at 1:13am / United States (Idaho) / Animals

Today, as a public defender, my client was actually innocent for once. I intended to utterly destroy the prosecution's case and demonstrate his good character. That plan went straight to hell when he showed up heavily intoxicated. FML

by Anonymous / 03/04/2016 at 4:59pm / United States (Virginia) / Work

Today, a teacher told me in all seriousness that she believes my son, who has severe learning difficulties, is likely demonically possessed. I'm sorry, but what century are we living in? Now I have to get him moved to another school so he doesn't have to be in the care of this nutjob. FML

by Anonymous / 02/12/2016 at 1:47pm / United States (California) / Kids

Today, my grandma got drunk, tried to change the TV channel with my Xbox controller, and slurred at me to fuck off when I told her it wasn't the remote. She pulls this kind of crap way too often. FML

by sick of this shit / 02/06/2016 at 12:04am / Canada (British Columbia) / Miscellaneous

Today, my cellphone-hating teacher called someone during class, so I called him out about it. Turned out his wife was having a tumor removed, and he was calling to see if she was okay. FML

Today, I absentmindedly smiled and told my grandfather to "have fun" before closing the door behind him. He was leaving to go to his chemotherapy session for lung cancer. FML

by Sunflora219 / 01/21/2016 at 9:34am / United States (New York) / Health

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I visited the hospital with my boyfriend to have an injury checked. When the doctor removed the band-aid, my boyfriend started screaming and passed out. I had to get him out of the room using a wheelchair. The "injury" is a cut in his finger. FML

by tessisue / 01/04/2016 at 6:18am / Germany / Health

Today, I found out you can get hemorrhoids during labor even if you have a c-section. FML

by Anonymous / 12/25/2015 at 9:35pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found a disturbing video on my 8-year-old's tablet. In the video, I was suffering from sleep paralysis. He's convinced I'm part demon. FML

by mommiedearest / 12/24/2015 at 11:06am / United States (South Carolina) / Kids

Today, my boyfriend dumped me during what was supposed to be a romantic getaway at a remote log cabin. FML

by pabj208 / 12/22/2015 at 11:53am / United Kingdom / Love

Today, I was at a small secret Santa with a group of friends. Everyone got each other some amazing gifts, the first person got a homemade self portrait, the second person got some professional grade playing cards, the third person got an album of past memories, and I got a pack of pens. FML

by ET / 12/21/2015 at 6:30pm / United States (Arizona) / Miscellaneous

Today, I used my phone to take pictures of my hemorrhoids to show my doctor, forgetting I'd set my phone to upload all photos to a shared Dropbox account. My mother-in-law called. FML

by NewMom1115 / 12/17/2015 at 5:53pm / United States (Washington) / Health

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.