FML with : Unopened

Number of results : 10

Today, I was packing, when my parents told me to put my little sister's toothbrush in the top pocket of their suitcase. The pocket I opened had 3 unopened boxes of condoms in it. We're going to my gran's house, and I'm going to be sleeping on a mattress on the floor of their room. FML

by Anonymous / 01/26/2014 at 12:10am / United States (Colorado) / Intimacy

Today, I was at the store, when I saw my boyfriend in line in front of me. I looked to see what he was purchasing; it was a pack of condoms. When I questioned him, he said that, "They're for us, babe!" We already have an unopened pack at home, and it's my time of the month. FML

by MenstruallyFrustrated / 07/23/2013 at 1:18pm / United States (Arizona) / Intimacy

Today, my laziness hit a new low when I sat on an unopened folding chair to avoid the effort of opening it up. FML

by mets300 / 04/13/2013 at 7:22am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found an old toy that I gave to my daughter several years ago. It was still unopened, and long forgotten, so I decided to re-gift it to one of my friend's children. My daughter immediately remembered her "favorite" toy and started crying inconsolably. FML

by Great. / 02/22/2013 at 5:32pm / Brazil (Minas Gerais) / Kids

Today, I came home to find that my girlfriend had repainted my bedroom. As she had offered to do it, it shouldn't have been a problem. However, she decided to return the several unopened cans of off-white paint that I'd bought for something "more neutral." Like "Sunset Orange." FML

by spaceforrent / 11/16/2012 at 12:51am / United States / Love

Today, I received my first negative feedback on my otherwise flawless eBay record. The woman who bought the item said it wasn't as delicious as she was expecting, so there must be something wrong with it. What was I selling? A new and unopened lipstick. FML

by facepalm / 06/05/2012 at 10:48am / United Kingdom (Bristol, City of) / Miscellaneous

Today, someone threw an open soda can at me from a car. It missed, so they circled around and threw an unopened can. That one hit. FML

by Anonymous / 05/20/2012 at 9:10pm / United States (Missouri) / Miscellaneous

Today, my mom was snooping around my room, and found the unopened box of glow in the dark condoms I bought myself year ago. She laughed and said, "No takers yet, eh?" FML

by Animal / 02/24/2011 at 2:14pm / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy

Today, my friends were all talking about the first time they bought condoms. I can still remember the first time I bought them; in fact they are unopened and expired in my bedside table. FML

by vcarder / 09/26/2009 at 4:00am / United Kingdom / Miscellaneous

Today, I was having a garage sale and my mother-in-law came by to see what I was selling. She decided to buy these ugly green wine glasses that were still unopened. It turns out that she gave those to my wife and I when we got married. FML

by anonymous / 06/10/2009 at 4:05pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous