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FML with : future child

Number of results : 8

Today, my girlfriend dumped me after I told her I found out I have diabetes. She thought it was an STD and I had cheated on her. So I explained what it really was and she dumped me again because she didn't want her future children to inherit my fucked up DNA. FML

#21473781
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28866) - you deserved it (1922)

On 09/28/2015 at 2:49pm - misc - by Guy (man) - Romania (Bucuresti)

Today, my husband again lost his keys. It's a daily struggle to find them. This time they were in an ice cube, literally. He said he must have accidentally put them in there when making ice. He's going to be the father of my future children. FML

#21360688
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35720) - you deserved it (8426)

On 02/21/2015 at 10:47pm - misc - by wife - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend and I tried out a website where you upload pictures of two people, and it shows you what their future children might look like. She actually started crying because the kid we were shown wasn't cute enough for her liking. FML

#21232887
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38691) - you deserved it (4258)

On 08/08/2014 at 11:19pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Nebraska)

Today, the girl I'm dating mentioned that she'd had her healthy wisdom teeth removed to prevent her future children from having wisdom teeth. I laughed. She wasn't joking. FML

Today, while landscaping my backyard, I was pulling a big weed out of the ground. After the last tug, the soil came free, but ended up with me punching myself full force in the nuts. I think my future children are already filing for parental abuse. FML

#19508765
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24469) - you deserved it (4257)

On 04/21/2012 at 11:27pm - health - by JurassicHole (man) - United States

Today, my girlfriend of three days asked if we could start naming our future children. FML

#19285505
272 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34805) - you deserved it (4685)

On 03/15/2012 at 10:21pm - love - by spermbankonlegs (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my wife and I were planning our nursery for our future child. She said that we'd be painting it pink either way. I asked what would happen if we had a boy. She said "Oh, he'll be gay" with a menacing glare. I'm worried. FML

#15804993
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42965) - you deserved it (6868)

On 04/16/2011 at 6:59am - misc - by Worried (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I told my boyfriend that I was afraid our future children would be fat and ugly. He reassured me, saying that he was sure our spawn would take on after him. FML

#59488
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36271) - you deserved it (12918)

On 02/17/2009 at 3:30am - love - by Noname (woman) - Canada (Ontario)



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