Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

FML with : future child

Number of results : 7

Today, my husband again lost his keys. It's a daily struggle to find them. This time they were in an ice cube, literally. He said he must have accidentally put them in there when making ice. He's going to be the father of my future children. FML

#21360688
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33131) - you deserved it (7888)

On 02/21/2015 at 10:47pm - misc - by wife - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend and I tried out a website where you upload pictures of two people, and it shows you what their future children might look like. She actually started crying because the kid we were shown wasn't cute enough for her liking. FML

#21232887
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36803) - you deserved it (4086)

On 08/08/2014 at 11:19pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Nebraska)

Today, the girl I'm dating mentioned that she'd had her healthy wisdom teeth removed to prevent her future children from having wisdom teeth. I laughed. She wasn't joking. FML

Today, while landscaping my backyard, I was pulling a big weed out of the ground. After the last tug, the soil came free, but ended up with me punching myself full force in the nuts. I think my future children are already filing for parental abuse. FML

#19508765
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22363) - you deserved it (4018)

On 04/21/2012 at 11:27pm - health - by JurassicHole (man) - United States

Today, my girlfriend of three days asked if we could start naming our future children. FML

#19285505
271 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32001) - you deserved it (4423)

On 03/15/2012 at 10:21pm - love - by spermbankonlegs (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my wife and I were planning our nursery for our future child. She said that we'd be painting it pink either way. I asked what would happen if we had a boy. She said "Oh, he'll be gay" with a menacing glare. I'm worried. FML

#15804993
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39185) - you deserved it (6369)

On 04/16/2011 at 6:59am - misc - by Worried (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I told my boyfriend that I was afraid our future children would be fat and ugly. He reassured me, saying that he was sure our spawn would take on after him. FML

#59488
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33105) - you deserved it (11929)

On 02/17/2009 at 3:30am - love - by Noname (woman) - Canada (Ontario)



Mathilde Morieux's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Mathilde Morieux's illustrated FML
  • Madonna must be the only person breathing a sigh of relief right now thanks to all the idiots arguing about the colour of a dress. Thanks to a badly-lit photograph, everyone seems to have forgotten that she super…

Friday 27 February 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: