FML with : O, o

Number of results : 16

Today, I was texting my boyfriend and things were getting a little steamy. He said, "I really want you right now." So, of course, I told him to come over. To which he replied, "Nah." FML

by DreeStahr / 09/30/2016 at 12:05am / United States (Missouri) / Intimacy

Today, I bought a friendship bracelet. I'm not sure what's sadder, the fact that I don't actually have a friend to give the other half to, or that I'm actually wearing one of them so it looks like I have friends. FML

by very very lonely / 09/24/2016 at 12:18am / Miscellaneous

Today, I got a letter from my old bank saying I owe them over 400 dollars. I closed the account 3 months ago, or at least I thought I did. The teller never finished closing it and I've been getting hammered with maintenance fees and overdrafts on an account I didn't even want anymore. FML

by vxdragon23 / 08/03/2016 at 12:48am / United States (New York) / Money

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my grandma was sent to the hospital so I called out of work. My bosses told me that if I didn't come in I would be fired. I did so, only to find out they needed me there so I could close the restaurant while they left early to go to a party. FML

by CLupo / 12/17/2015 at 12:06am / United States (California) / Work

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was turned down from the dream job that I was promised two years ago, once my chemo and radiation therapy was finished. His excuse? He never actually expected me to survive. FML

by kysier / 03/01/2015 at 6:36pm / United States (Kentucky) / Work

Today, my girlfriend's dad returned home from deployment. Being the grade A fucktard that I am, I got flustered and asked, "So um, did you make it back?" He looked me dead in the eyes and said completely deadpan, "No, obviously I died. Moron." FML

by whoops / 08/01/2014 at 4:45pm / United States (Indiana) / Miscellaneous

Today, my car was broken into, on the same night I stayed up late researching how to install my new car alarm. FML

by Anonymous / 10/25/2013 at 1:20pm / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous

Today, while working at my job at a nursing home, I slipped and fell. It wouldn't be so bad if it was just water. No, one of the residents had just had an "accident". FML

by no name / 06/22/2013 at 3:20am / United States (Michigan) / Work

Today, I received a call from the company I applied to, only to have my father pick it up and make fun of the man's accent. They won't call me back or take any of my calls, and my dad is completely unapologetic. FML

by Bashit / 03/31/2012 at 9:00pm / United States (Texas) / Work

Today, I found out that the only thing worse than a psycho, overbearing, controlling girlfriend is a psycho, overbearing and controlling ex-girlfriend. FML

by bluesox4 / 02/06/2012 at 12:50am / United States (Utah) / Love

Today, while dancing at my studio, our instructor was giving us all characters opposite of ourselves to portray in an improv solo. My friends got cool things like "creepy" and "vulnerable". I got "extremely sexy". FML

by apparentlyunsexy / 10/27/2011 at 12:00am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I finally gathered up the guts to say hi to the girl I like. As I was walking down the hallway, I saw her and waved hello, only to walk into a bathroom door. FML

by Anonymous / 10/24/2011 at 6:07am / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, I thought I'd be helpful and pick up my Dad's car from the repairs shop for him while he was at work. So, on my own, I hopped in my car and I drove the 15 minutes out to the shop. Only upon arriving did I consider the situation I'd put myself in. FML

by BackAndForth / 10/18/2011 at 12:27am / United States (Illinois) / Transportation

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I ran into my ex-boyfriend who dumped me after 2 1/2 years because I got fat. The last two years I've lost 68 lbs, am happier and couldn't wait to shove that in his face. So, of course the first time he see's me I'm alone, pushing a shopping cart full of ice cream for a party later. FML

by WeightAMinute / 07/08/2009 at 9:28pm / United States (Illinois) / Love

Today, my friend and I decided to wear a new red lipstick. The guy I like turned around, looked at her and said, "Red is a really interesting, sexy color. Pretty bold. Not bad." and he smiled. I waited, smiling also, only for him frown and say, "Your teeth are REALLY yellow." FML

by Anonymous / 05/20/2009 at 2:34pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous