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FML with : vibrator

Number of results : 42

Today, my boyfriend stayed over at my place for the first time. I left him in the bedroom for a couple of minutes while I used the toilet, and when I came back, he was holding my vibrator. He angrily asked me, "What the hell is this? You know this is cheating, right?" FML

#21113687
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38205) - you deserved it (5281)

On 04/15/2014 at 12:37pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my dogs freaked out and started getting violent because they thought the sound of my vibrator was the other's growling. FML

#21048300
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38993) - you deserved it (9481)

On 02/02/2014 at 4:50pm - animals - by foops (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I woke up and found $30 slipped under my door with a note that read, "Please buy yourself a quieter vibrator. -Mom and Dad." FML

#20874309
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49650) - you deserved it (19873)

On 09/09/2013 at 11:15am - intimacy - by anon (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my boyfriend dumped me for "cheating" on him by using a vibrator. FML

#20851263
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48001) - you deserved it (14209)

On 08/23/2013 at 7:30pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my boyfriend told me that he was going to buy me a "magic wand". Being a Harry Potter fanatic, I assumed he meant a replica wand. It turns out he actually meant a Magic Wand vibrator. I was more excited about the HP wand. FML

#20758994
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42617) - you deserved it (8489)

On 07/01/2013 at 11:37pm - intimacy - by whorecrux (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was trying out my first vibrator. Soon enough, my 12-year-old sister opened my door, walked in, and saw me naked from the waist down. She laughed, called me a virgin, and left. FML

#20574621
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48685) - you deserved it (16725)

On 04/04/2013 at 12:04pm - intimacy - by Ribbed for Her Disaster (woman) - United Kingdom (Kent)

Today, I'm 8 months pregnant with a horribly sore back and an insensitive husband. I'm so desperate for relief that I'm lying on the couch, using my vibrator to give myself a back massage. FML

#20523063
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28273) - you deserved it (3077)

On 02/26/2013 at 2:11pm - misc - by guyssuck (woman) - Canada (Northwest Territories)

Today, after giving my mother and my girlfriend their Christmas presents, I realized just how similar they looked both in box size and wrapping paper. I noticed after my mother gasped upon finding a vibrator in her box. FML

#20420433
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16216) - you deserved it (46924)

On 12/25/2012 at 2:12am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I helped my friend, who is a slob, move out of my house. I found the source of the funky smell she's been complaining about, under her bed. It was her vibrator. I found it with my bare hands. I had to bleach my hands twice and I still don't feel clean. FML

#20081199
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25519) - you deserved it (1539)

On 09/20/2012 at 8:05pm - intimacy - by MistressSuzuka (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I was playing with my vibrator. I was getting close when all of a sudden it short-circuited and made a sound like a laughing clown, scaring me half to death. FML

Today, my unemployed mother decided to yet again stay home and drink heavily. So far she's kicked me out of the house, tipped over our sofa and thrown her vibrator out the window. FML

#19920264
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18788) - you deserved it (1037)

On 07/10/2012 at 7:26pm - misc - by Deadcat101 - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, I discovered my children had found my vibrator and buried it in the cat's litter box. FML

#19850668
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17593) - you deserved it (8323)

On 06/26/2012 at 1:13pm - intimacy - by Heather (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I took a picture in front of my bathroom mirror and posted it on Facebook. When I checked it later, it had 20 comments on the picture. I was feeling good until I read the comments and looked at the picture again. I left my vibrator on the the bathroom counter. FML

#19609877
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9488) - you deserved it (53699)

On 05/12/2012 at 12:24am - intimacy - by Hunter101 (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was having phone sex with my boyfriend. Trying to be sexy, I told him what I was doing with my vibrator. I heard a loud bang, followed by him shouting, "Why don't you just fucking marry it, then?!" and then hanging up. FML

#19608230
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22083) - you deserved it (6697)

On 05/11/2012 at 6:02pm - intimacy - by 504-A1 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I got home from my 6-week vacation. Apparently, my mum cleaned my room for me while I was gone because my vibrator was neatly tucked into my blanket, next to my pillow instead of being hidden under my bed. FML

#18868671
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21641) - you deserved it (7746)

On 01/21/2012 at 5:45am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Russian Federation



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