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FML with : weed

Number of results : 54

Today, my psycho-obsessed ex-girlfriend blabbed all about how she got a check in the mail for $1000 from CrimeStoppers on Facebook and Twitter. This explains how my current girlfriend and two of my friends all got arrested last week for having weed. FML

#21522828
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15779) - you deserved it (3758)

On 02/04/2016 at 5:55pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, after being sick all day with the flu, I asked my husband to wash the dishes after I went to bed. He said he couldn't because he had a large, important project for work that needed to get done. I woke up a couple of hours later to find him smoking weed on the couch and watching cartoons. FML

#21499350
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20719) - you deserved it (2192)

On 12/02/2015 at 3:45pm - love - by shotdown (woman) - United States (California)

Today, after my close friend had his baby, he told me that he was no longer going to be selling weed at his house. I was happy for him, because it's unsafe. Until I found out he was still selling at my house with the help of my roommates, without telling me. FML

#21492969
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25351) - you deserved it (3761)

On 11/15/2015 at 9:34pm - misc - by Potted - United States (Texas)

Today, my brother got his very first paycheck and blew it all on weed and a godawful tattoo, whereas I have been saving steadily for three years. Yet according to mum and dad, I'm the one who is irresponsible with money, because if I was being responsible I'd have enough for my own house by now. FML

#21485888
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23632) - you deserved it (1502)

On 10/29/2015 at 4:53pm - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I baked some brownies and after my mom ate one, I joked that I put weed in them. Turns out the placebo effect's a bitch, because she quickly started acting high as a kite. One bitch fit later, the brownies are in the trash and I'm grounded until I tell her where I bought the "weed". FML

#21469489
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22866) - you deserved it (5058)

On 09/17/2015 at 10:54am - misc - by mother teresa was a cunt (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my mom called me a druggie after she found out I smoked weed once. She's now threatening to sell my car, tell my boss, and ban me from seeing my fiancée. I'm 24. FML

#21464117
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25509) - you deserved it (3694)

On 09/03/2015 at 12:30pm - misc - by kp - United States

Today, my mom found my weed stash and went berserk, grounding me and saying she's going to have my bedroom door removed. Less than an hour later, I found her laughing and smoking the same stash with my dad in the backyard. FML

#21421662
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28890) - you deserved it (9231)

On 06/06/2015 at 5:11am - misc - by lehonX9 (man) - Germany (Niedersachsen)

Today, my dad sat me down and angrily accused me of doing drugs, all because he's noticed I've recently become a lot more energetic and emotional than usual. The truth is, I'd been smoking weed daily for 3 years and just decided to never smoke it again 2 weeks ago. FML

#21397872
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31971) - you deserved it (5761)

On 04/22/2015 at 9:39am - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I used an air freshener in my room to make it smell good. At first, the smell was pretty pleasant. However, by the time it'd "soaked in" it smelled just like weed. My whole room stinks of it, and now my mum is convinced I've been smoking pot in my room. FML

#21387075
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26560) - you deserved it (3639)

On 04/03/2015 at 3:05pm - misc - by HtotheFtotheS - United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire)

Today, my mom accused me of smoking weed. Truth is, I'd just ripped the quietest and weirdest smelling fart of my life. She wouldn't believe me, accused me of making stupid excuses up, and grounded me. FML

#21350938
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29936) - you deserved it (2820)

On 02/06/2015 at 1:51pm - misc - by valarmorgoolies (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my asshat roommate tricked me into eating a weed brownie. I thought it was his terrible attempt at baking regular brownies until it kicked in at college. I was so high, I started giggling like a schoolgirl when my instructor said "Dickens". Now everyone thinks I'm a retard. FML

#21342882
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33079) - you deserved it (4630)

On 01/23/2015 at 1:12pm - misc - by Annomymous (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, thanks to some asswipe drunk driver fleeing the cops the wrong way down a one-way street, I've now had my third wreck this year. My insurance premium's now higher than Bob Marley in a weed factory. FML

#21321099
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34760) - you deserved it (3278)

On 12/20/2014 at 7:53pm - money - by financially_wreckd (man) -

Today, my neighbor showed me footage of my 7-year-old son spraying his beloved rose garden with weed killer. The whole garden is dead as fuck, and I'm now being taken to small claims court. FML

#21311905
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34109) - you deserved it (7297)

On 12/05/2014 at 8:44am - love - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I tried to blackmail my dad by threatening to tell mom about the bong and weed he keeps hidden in the garage. Turns out she already knew about it and neither of them give a shit. Now I'm grounded until the new year. FML

#21294812
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19256) - you deserved it (36374)

On 11/08/2014 at 3:36pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, my dad found out I recently tried weed. He called me a useless waste of air and grounded me for the rest of the year. Then he went outside and smoked his third cigarette of the morning. FML

#21261280
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38323) - you deserved it (14993)

On 09/19/2014 at 2:34pm - kids - by hypercrite dad (man) - United Kingdom



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