Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

FML with : girlfriend

Number of results : 2306

Today, I met my girlfriend's parents for the first time. Within minutes, they said I needed to leave. Their reason? Apparently, I was mocking her dad's speech impediment. I also have one but they wouldn't believe me. FML

#21382684
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9619) - you deserved it (562)

On 03/27/2015 at 10:12pm - love - by biblepain - United States (Arizona)

Today my girlfriend of a month told me that the only thing keeping her from swallowing a bottle of pills is being in a relationship with me, because she doesn't handle breakups well. FML

Today, I overheard my dickhead dad telling my girlfriend she's too good for me, then asking if she wants to settle for someone like me. FML

#21378798
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26914) - you deserved it (2169)

On 03/21/2015 at 4:55am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Aberdeen City)

Today, I broke up with my girlfriend because I felt unappreciated. She found it appropriate to sarcastically say, "Oh no, how will I ever be able to open my jars?" FML

#21378617
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28746) - you deserved it (4054)

On 03/20/2015 at 9:32pm - love - by tumbleshay - United States (Oregon)

Today, I took my girlfriend to meet my parents. My dad thought it'd be hilarious to act surprised and ask me if I'd already dumped the girlfriend I introduced him to yesterday. She slapped me and stormed out of the house before my dad could tell her it was a joke. FML

#21378402
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30862) - you deserved it (2128)

On 03/20/2015 at 1:50pm - love - by not picking up (man) - Slovenia (Skofljica)

Today, my girlfriend dumped me. Not for cheating or for flirting, but because I wear tighty whities. FML

#21376186
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27560) - you deserved it (17281)

On 03/17/2015 at 3:46am - intimacy - by Anonymous -

Today, during a date with my girlfriend, I found out you can hiccup hard enough to convince someone that you're having a seizure. FML

#21375726
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28410) - you deserved it (2267)

On 03/16/2015 at 3:15pm - misc - by redneckpunk (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, a guy beat the crap out of me for supposedly sleeping with his girlfriend. I didn't get a chance to tell him my brother lives with me and that he had the wrong guy. When my brother got home, he didn't ask if I was okay, but rather if the guy was coming back for him. FML

#21375070
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34891) - you deserved it (2370)

On 03/15/2015 at 2:40pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (West Virginia)

Today, I worked up the courage to tell my girlfriend that I love her. She made a face like she'd just sucked on a lemon and said "Um... yay, I guess...?" and awkwardly left the room. FML

#21374314
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30127) - you deserved it (2504)

On 03/14/2015 at 7:04am - love - by Anonymous (man) - Netherlands (Flevoland)

Today, I jokingly sent my girlfriend a link to an article about giving better head. She didn't think it was funny, and has since sent me numerous articles about the female orgasm, and I just got a link to the Wikipedia article about the clitoris. FML

#21372045
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12987) - you deserved it (44992)

On 03/10/2015 at 7:15pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, my girlfriend took off my pants for the first time. She was more impressed by the pattern on my boxers than by my cock. FML

#21370915
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30696) - you deserved it (5686)

On 03/09/2015 at 1:13am - intimacy - by fruitoftheloom - United States (Arizona)

Today, my long-term boyfriend said that if we ever finally get married, his ex-girlfriend will definitely have to be a bridesmaid. FML

#21369466
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30272) - you deserved it (2542)

On 03/06/2015 at 6:30pm - love - by Not Engaged - United Kingdom (Dudley)

Today, my girlfriend said she was going to start appreciating the little things in life. She's starting with my penis. FML

#21364983
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33696) - you deserved it (4921)

On 02/28/2015 at 12:03am - intimacy - by FreshDonuts (man) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, my girlfriend and I were talking about times we'd made our mothers cry. She said she'd only made her mother cry once. When I asked when, she said, "When I told her I was thinking about dating you." FML

#21364495
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31873) - you deserved it (3007)

On 02/27/2015 at 9:13am - love - by shoggoth_wild - United States (Mississippi)

Today, the neighbors called the cops because they heard "gun shots". My girlfriend and I were popping bubble wrap. FML

#21364157
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30068) - you deserved it (2472)

On 02/26/2015 at 7:35pm - misc - by We're still popping them - United States (California)



Sophie Marie's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Sophie Marie's illustrated FML
  • Hi there Friday, great to see you again! What are we going to talk about this week? It's the same question that most people ask themselves while strolling into their usual bar on a Friday night, on their way to…

Friday 27 March 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: