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FMLs submitted from West Virginia

Today, I called the number a guy had given me at a bar last night. I got the Soulja Boy Hotline. Now every few hours I get messages on my phone like 'Good morning! Jump on up and get yo swag on, this is Soulja Boy!' and I can't seem to get it to stop. FML

#2482852
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51775) - you deserved it (8117)

On 05/31/2009 at 10:05pm - love - by rain (man) - United States (West Virginia)

Today, I was at the mall with my girlfriend's family. Her 7 year old brother told me he was feeling sad, so I tried to give him a pat on the back, but it turns out he had a bruise there. He yelled out "don't touch me there!" In the middle of the mall. Now her parents think I'm a pedophile. FML

#1971968
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48087) - you deserved it (3714)

On 05/16/2009 at 4:39am - misc - by notacreep (man) - United States (West Virginia)

Today, I asked my boyfriend what he thinks about long term relationships. He said, "Our relationship is kinda like having a dog. Chances are, your dog is going to die pretty quickly, before you do. Dogs and humans just aren't meant to be together forever." He compared me to a dying dog. FML

#1123118
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59015) - you deserved it (5201)

On 04/19/2009 at 4:49pm - love - by wvugirl (woman) - United States (West Virginia)

Today, I was talking with my father on the phone when I mentioned I wanted to stay at school over the summer and work. He asked if it would be lonely with the campus empty, when I replied that my friends would be working here too. He asked: "What, all two of them?" FML

#829744
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52624) - you deserved it (4867)

On 04/06/2009 at 1:26am - misc - by halebop (woman) - United States (West Virginia)

Today, my family gathered at my 96 year old great-grandmother's surprise birthday party that was my idea. When she walked in, we surprised her so much that she literally had a heart attack. She is now in the hospital. FML

#172580
22 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56907) - you deserved it (16443)

On 03/01/2009 at 5:04pm - misc - by Ashley J. (woman) - United States (West Virginia)

Today, I shook hands with a girl and held onto her hand while telling her she had very tiny, delicate hands. When I let go to look at them, I discovered she only had two fingers. FML

#30362
20 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12269) - you deserved it (34295)

On 02/12/2009 at 8:28am - misc - by KWM (man) - United States (West Virginia)

Today, after being in the hospital for 2 days with no visitors, I got my first phone call. It was my best friend asking if he could date my ex girlfriend. FML

#26811
25 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59713) - you deserved it (2404)

On 02/11/2009 at 6:33pm - misc - by EKG (man) - United States (West Virginia)

Today, I was offered a job. It only took me a year and 17 interviews to get an offer, and I have a PhD. FML

#3922
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29078) - you deserved it (3111)

On 01/31/2009 at 12:37am - work - by RogerReady - United States (West Virginia)

Today, I had a dream that I was 25, unemployed, living with my parents, and still completely in love with someone who no longer feels the same way about me. Oh wait... it wasn't a dream. FML

#1809
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24491) - you deserved it (6311)

On 01/19/2009 at 11:23pm - misc - by HeadTrauma - United States (West Virginia)



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