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FMLs submitted from Virginia

TODAY , I OPEND EMAIL EXPECTING TO SEE MESSAGES FROM FRIENDS AN FAMILY WISHING ME A HAPPY BIRTHDAY , BUT THERE WERE NONE. THERE WERE HAPPY BIRTHDAY MESSAGES FROM PIZZA HUT AN VICTORIA'S SECRET , HOWEVER. FML

#1525612
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54919) - you deserved it (3907)

On 05/01/2009 at 2:36pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Virginia)

Today I decidd to run outside. I noticd a really hot guy mowing his lawn. I ran a couple of laps past him. After ahile hen I slowd down I smild at him and he replid You look really hot.( I thankd him and he quickly replid )No I mean your sweating a lot." FML

#1505270
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16408) - you deserved it (47057)

On 04/30/2009 at 8:52pm - love - by Eli123 (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I realizd the senior thesis I turnd in last week uses the word "asses" instead of "assess" 17 times. FML

#1423979
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21389) - you deserved it (58295)

On 04/28/2009 at 2:47pm - misc - by fuckspellcheck (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was at soccer practice. The ground's keeper just aerated the field, and mah teammates and I decided to throw the cylindrical clumps of dirt at each other. I got hit in the face with one. It wasn't dirt. It was a clump of wet dog poop. FML

#1411450
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46464) - you deserved it (12241)

On 04/28/2009 at 12:35am - animals - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today...hile on a run off campus with mah german shepherd.!! !! I trid to impress a couple of hot fraternity guys playing football outside of there house !! I broke out into a full sprint !! I then looool got tangld in mah dog's leash and fell straight in to a parkd jeep knocking myself unconscious !! FML

#1408593
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15449) - you deserved it (54548)

On 04/27/2009 at 10:10pm - misc - by Radgirl (woman) - United States (Virginia)

2day After Driving A Few Hours Late At Night I Decided To Entertain The Car Tailgating Me By Not Letting Him Pass. After Doing This 4 3miles, Reaching 93MPH, I Decided To Let The Car Pass Me. When I Switched Lanes, The Car Tailgating Me Light Up In Red And Blue. It Was A Cop. FML

#1363713
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10690) - you deserved it (91113)

On 04/26/2009 at 5:50pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I met a really cute guy at work. He askd 4 mah number, and I wrote it down on a piece of paper. After looking at the paper, he crumpld it up, yelld "Do u think I'm stupid? I know the rejection hotline when I see it", and walkd away. It was mah real phone number. FML

#1283810
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65260) - you deserved it (3601)

On 04/24/2009 at 4:18am - love - by sad (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today , I got a email from boss. He said he was going to have to let me go for missing so much work over the last week. I was laid off two months ago. I don't know wat is more depressing , getting fired from a job twice or the fact it took two months for them to notice I wasn't there anymore. fat FML

#1189537
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60919) - you deserved it (3010)

On 04/21/2009 at 11:11am - work - by laxguy23 (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, Family And I Ran Into An Older Man Parents Knew. He Continually Askd Me Questions Lyk Do You Play Football, Have You Startd Shaving Yet, Etc. I Thought He Was Joking. He Told Parents I Had Grown Into Quite A Young Man. I Am A Grl And He Wasn't Joking. FML

#1019315
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (71242) - you deserved it (4438)

On 04/16/2009 at 12:53pm - misc - by yellow_sunflowers101 (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I Was With Girlfriend In Her Room . She Starts Screaming . Her Father Bursts In And, Thinking I'm Some Kind Of Rapist, Hits Me In The Head With A Baseball Bat . Not Bad Enough? I Wasn't The One Making Her Scream . There Was A Huge Spider On The Wall . Fat FML

#927361
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (98177) - you deserved it (4681)

On 04/12/2009 at 2:11pm - animals - by spiderhater (man) - United States (Virginia)

Taday mah parent asked if I wanted to go to military school so i said "yeah that would be awesome..." thinking it was a joke . They weren't joking . FML

#919776
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20653) - you deserved it (39237)

On 04/11/2009 at 10:44pm - misc - by AlienZ (man) - United States (Virginia)



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