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FMLs submitted from Texas

Today, I was on the phone with my senile grandma, when I told her I had to go because I had an appointment at the clinic. For some reason, she assumed I was talking about an abortion clinic, and started raging at me and calling me a murderer. FML

#21450246
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22706) - you deserved it (1598)

On 07/31/2015 at 11:39pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my grandpa set out snare traps to catch the foxes that have been around our property, because he wanted to protect our dog from being attacked by them. I then got a phone call from my dad telling me our dog got caught in one. FML

Today, I pulled several socks from under my son's bed. I spent far too long trying to figure out why they were so stiff before I finally realized. FML

#21446754
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29011) - you deserved it (4959)

On 07/24/2015 at 10:04pm - kids - by Sad Mom - United States (Texas)

Today, while on my Dad's computer, I looked through the browser history to find the name of a website I'd visited on it the other day. I soon found out he watches a staggering amount of downright frightening incest porn. I'm disturbed on so many levels. FML

#21445392
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25830) - you deserved it (3125)

On 07/22/2015 at 7:52am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I went downstairs early in the morning to watch a movie. As I walked into the living room and reached for the light switch, I heard my dad say "Knew you'd change your mind. Get them panties off." followed by the sound of a zipper being undone. I've never been so mortified in my life. FML

#21442030
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33716) - you deserved it (2466)

On 07/15/2015 at 12:29pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, while walking home with my girlfriend we decided to take a shortcut in the woods. After hearing a huge noise, she pushed me and ran. FML

#21440556
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23092) - you deserved it (2431)

On 07/12/2015 at 3:56pm - love - by sheWontbeOnMyZombieApocteam - United States (Texas)

Today, my psycho ex girlfriend got up in my face after I dumped her. She said I'm going to pay and that one day, when I think I'm safe and happy, my joy will turn to ash in my mouth. When I pointed out she'd just ripped off a Game of Thrones quote, she kneed me in the balls. FML

#21439786
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25991) - you deserved it (3678)

On 07/10/2015 at 10:42pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, while waiting the required 5 minutes for my hair removal cream to work, my cat rubbed all over my legs while I wasn't looking. After getting clawed to death throwing her in the bath to get the cream off, all her hair on that side fell off. I now have a half hairless cat. FML

#21438347
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22956) - you deserved it (3931)

On 07/08/2015 at 3:04am - animals - by coolcat10156 (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was laying in bed facing my dad. In the middle of our conversation, I noticed he became interested in something behind me. I turn around to the sight of my mom lifting up her shirt, flashing her boobs. FML

#21437094
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25867) - you deserved it (2813)

On 07/05/2015 at 11:18pm - misc - by madisonnkelly - United States (Texas)

Today, I was called a selfish brat for asking for a pillow as my birthday present. FML

#21433680
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27555) - you deserved it (1937)

On 06/29/2015 at 3:42am - misc - by youdontknowmewhy (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, after all of the business cards for the car dealership that I work for were printed, the phone number was wrong, and the lady got so pissed about getting so many calls that she told them that they had won a free car. I had to tell dozens of ecstatic customers that they hadn't. FML

#21430788
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22391) - you deserved it (5475)

On 06/23/2015 at 6:37pm - work - by Luke - United States (Texas)

Today, while taking a slow night at my waitressing job, I thought I heard the sound of crying coming from the kitchen. I rushed in, thinking something terrible had happened. Nope, the bus boy was just watching porn on his phone with no headphones. FML

#21429840
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24659) - you deserved it (1678)

On 06/21/2015 at 11:08pm - intimacy - by koanroak - United States (Texas)

Today, I went to a job interview, and my father in law's house. As soon as I got home I went to the bathroom and noticed my bloody pantyliner had fallen out at one of these places. I don't know which one is worse. FML

#21428990
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24510) - you deserved it (2576)

On 06/20/2015 at 10:03am - misc - by organizse - United States (Texas)



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