Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

FMLs submitted from South Australia

Today, I shaved my legs. I received endless compliments about how great they looked, and how jealous all the girls were. I'm a guy who shaved them for a themed party, for which I dressed up as a girl. FML

Today, I saw my mom changing the expiry date on milk. She genuinely thought this would make the milk sour later. FML

#19759587
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23116) - you deserved it (1729)

On 06/09/2012 at 9:54am - health - by WTF (woman) - Australia (South Australia)

Today, it was the only time in my life that I have ever received an A+ for something. Thank you, eBay buyer. FML

#19442358
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9020) - you deserved it (11132)

On 04/10/2012 at 10:39am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (South Australia)

Today, I told my daughter that she should put some love into her cooking. She started kissing the ingredients. FML

#19305380
7 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16142) - you deserved it (11611)

On 03/19/2012 at 12:59am - kids - by FoodyFood (woman) - Australia (South Australia)

Today, I texted my mom if she could pick me up from the hospital. She replied "No fatty, walk home." I have a broken foot. FML

#19226146
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30065) - you deserved it (2644)

On 03/06/2012 at 6:50am - health - by FootyFoot (man) - Australia (South Australia)

Today, my cat vomited violently. I can smell it but I can't find it. FML

#18520750
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27806) - you deserved it (2864)

On 12/15/2011 at 4:49pm - animals - by Anonymous - Australia (South Australia)

Today, my husband declined a $100k/year job due to him thinking that a full time job at one work place would be too 'depressing'. I'm a nurse and have to wipe other people's arses for a living, then come home to this lazy dick. FML

#17416952
212 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40531) - you deserved it (7558)

On 08/09/2011 at 9:48am - work - by Lauren - Australia (South Australia)

Today, my new mailbox key finally arrived. Not at the front door as I requested, but in the mailbox. FML

#17211287
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28733) - you deserved it (1816)

On 07/22/2011 at 12:20am - misc - by MailMaster (woman) - Australia (South Australia)

Today, my three-year-old daughter rushed in, excited about her new baby brother or sister. She was so excited, I didn't have the heart to tell her men can't have babies, and I just have a beer gut. FML

#17207646
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24416) - you deserved it (13261)

On 07/21/2011 at 7:46pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (South Australia)

Today, I learned how to wolf-whistle properly, and then learned what it feels like to be slapped on the head. FML

#16796718
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7487) - you deserved it (26215)

On 06/22/2011 at 9:31am - misc - by youknowwhatitis - Australia (South Australia)

Today, I was on my way home on my bike when a lady in a 4WD cut me off while beeping her horn and calling me a "stupid f**ker who should get a proper education." In her car, she was smoking, and her three children weren't wearing seat belts. FML

#15661688
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30459) - you deserved it (2416)

On 04/06/2011 at 3:43am - misc - by faza4327 (man) - Australia (South Australia)

Today, I was patting my kitten who was asleep underneath the blanket on my lap. My roommate walked in and gave me disgusted look. She thought I was playing with myself. FML

#13624722
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20236) - you deserved it (5575)

On 10/28/2010 at 8:00am - intimacy - by djoe - Australia (South Australia)

Today, it's my birthday, and the only person that called me was my boss. He wants me to cover his shift tonight. FML

#13448275
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29136) - you deserved it (2486)

On 10/14/2010 at 6:10pm - work - by unloved - Australia (South Australia)



FML's blog

  • Zoé's Illustrated FML
  • Hey there, young whippersnappers. Yes, you, the youth. I’m talking to you, sitting at home, scratching your asses. Why aren’t you doing something more constructive with your lives? Stop watching that shit…

Friday 18 April 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: