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FMLs submitted from Rhode Island

Today, I called an airline's customer service line. Apparently the way that they deal with uncommon problems is by having someone put you on hold for twenty minutes, answer and yell something unintelligible at you, put you back on hold, and repeat. This went on for over an hour. FML

#19397003
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17495) - you deserved it (1745)

On 04/02/2012 at 7:40pm - money - by unfriendlyskies (man) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I accidentally left my cell phone at the restaurant. When I realized my mistake, I went back to see if anyone had found it. They said no, so I gave them my number to call if it turned up. I realized later that I'd given them my cell phone number. FML

#19115429
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8580) - you deserved it (22912)

On 02/19/2012 at 2:29pm - misc - by queenbee12345678 - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, my son learned that when you slide a mug across the kitchen table, it doesn't stop where you expect it to like in the old cartoons. I then learned what it feels like to have a full mug of hot chocolate spilled onto my crotch. FML

#18972583
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24407) - you deserved it (3082)

On 02/01/2012 at 10:11pm - kids - by Bruce (man) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I accidentally slammed a door on my own arm flab. FML

#18915455
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13291) - you deserved it (28493)

On 01/26/2012 at 11:45am - health - by Anonymous - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I'm spending time with my granny, with whom I'm supposed to live with for a few weeks. I've noticed that she repeats the last word of every sentence I say, and now I'm wondering how it's possible for me to now be so horrible that I want to punch a sweet 92-year-old lady in the head. FML

#18387979
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24066) - you deserved it (5137)

On 11/29/2011 at 9:09pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I caught my wife slipping penis enlargement pills into my coffee. FML

#17795601
271 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48426) - you deserved it (8495)

On 09/21/2011 at 1:20pm - intimacy - by ThisBlows (man) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I got a spray tan. The lady asked what shade I wanted to be, and joking, I said the darkest. She took it seriously. Now no one can recognize me, and I have work tomorrow. FML

#17541150
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7675) - you deserved it (63824)

On 08/21/2011 at 8:17pm - misc - by Sally - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, my boyfriend of 2 1/2 years still refuses to memorize my phone number or remember my birthday because he says there is a limited amount of space in his brain and he does not want to push any important information out. FML

#17099687
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29564) - you deserved it (6466)

On 07/13/2011 at 9:44pm - love - by skidoosh (woman) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I received roughly 50 paper cuts while I was at work. I didn't realize this until after I applied hand sanitizer. FML

#16577754
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44638) - you deserved it (5782)

On 06/09/2011 at 12:35pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I got fired via text. The last sentence was, "Wish you the best, take care!" FML

#16476285
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28665) - you deserved it (3133)

On 06/02/2011 at 11:08pm - work - by amf (woman) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, when I weighed myself on my scale, it broke. FML

#16417126
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34532) - you deserved it (26916)

On 05/30/2011 at 12:12pm - misc - by trev - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I received my first wedding present in the mail. I opened it immediately and called the sender to say thanks. She yelled at me for opening it and, because she shipped it to me by mistake, requested it back. FML

#14964211
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28204) - you deserved it (3109)

On 02/13/2011 at 9:22pm - misc - by bride2be (woman) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I was busily having fun with my girlfriend, when suddenly the bedroom door opened and a man walked in, picked me up, and threw me outside the apartment. I was naked and didn't even know she was into men, much less had a husband. FML

#14961230
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44258) - you deserved it (9026)

On 02/13/2011 at 5:32pm - intimacy - by Katrina (woman) - United States (Rhode Island)



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