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FMLs submitted from Queensland

Today, I threw up on a police officer who was trying to do a random breath test. I wasn't drunk or hungover. I'm pregnant and suffering morning sickness. FML

#21356993
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32151) - you deserved it (2027)

On 02/15/2015 at 10:25pm - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (Queensland)

Today, while at the office, a surprise Valentine's gift arrived for me, the first I've ever received. It was a box of heart-shaped cookies. From my mother. I'm 39. FML

#21355623
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27181) - you deserved it (3098)

On 02/13/2015 at 10:49pm - love - by FMAhole - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I posted a photo on Facebook of me at a club with some friends. The first comment it got was "Just got a stiffy. 10/10." Thanks for that, dad. FML

#21351395
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28748) - you deserved it (3060)

On 02/07/2015 at 7:52am - misc - by gali-ma (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, when making a delivery for the restaurant I work for, a customer shoved and yelled at me because she didn't get any fries with her order. She didn't order any, which isn't unusual, considering we're a Chinese takeaway and don't even sell them. FML

#21347009
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27846) - you deserved it (1750)

On 01/30/2015 at 8:25pm - work - by Anonymous - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my nutjob girlfriend dumped me for refusing to stop talking to my best friend, just because she's a woman. Before she left, my now-ex decided to punish me by destroying the dissertation I've spent months working on, along with both backups of it. FML

#21337587
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35782) - you deserved it (3891)

On 01/15/2015 at 12:23pm - love - by Can I press charges? (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I was having a cheat meal after 2 weeks of strict dieting. When I opened the pizza box, I saw a cockroach. It'd been baked into the cheese. FML

#21332565
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34498) - you deserved it (6674)

On 01/07/2015 at 7:11am - misc - by ijustwantpizza - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I found out the person who's been stalking and harassing me online was actually my now ex-boyfriend. He only confessed as I finally picked up the phone to report it to the police. He basically said he wanted me to turn to him for comfort and protection, so he could "feel like a man". FML

#21323138
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30676) - you deserved it (2330)

On 12/24/2014 at 7:03am - misc - by jflac (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my mother-in-law asked for a copy of my son's death certificate so she could have her week-long island beach holiday classed as bereavement leave. FML

Today, my dad and grandpa came to a charity event that I helped set up for people who have autism. I appreciated their support, until I heard my dad say "Man, some of these 'tards are pretty hot." and my grandpa replying "Yeah. Probably like dead fish in bed, though." FML

#21316987
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32723) - you deserved it (2530)

On 12/13/2014 at 9:02pm - misc - by ashamed (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I had a dream that I kicked the moon like a soccer ball. It started swearing in my boyfriend's voice. That part wasn't a dream. FML

#21300835
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28748) - you deserved it (3449)

On 11/17/2014 at 5:00pm - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (Queensland)

Today, while driving to my daughter's wedding, the person behind us kept laying on her horn and yelling every time I stopped for a red light. That person was my wife. Sadly I'm too whipped to stand up to her and spent the whole drive pretending not to hear my passengers snickering at me. FML

#21299484
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25430) - you deserved it (7137)

On 11/15/2014 at 10:23am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I realized that at 20 years old I already have noticeable wrinkles around my eyes. But to balance it out, my chronic acne keeps me looking youthful. FML

#21299204
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28757) - you deserved it (2334)

On 11/14/2014 at 9:18pm - health - by Unlucky (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me via Twitter. FML

#21295236
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33182) - you deserved it (3232)

On 11/09/2014 at 3:37am - love - by Anonymous - Australia (Queensland)



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