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FMLs submitted from Oregon

Today, I went to work at my job as a secretary. I had been given the task to file my boss's collection of Playboy magazines alphabetically by name of the centerfold. There was one for every month from the years of 1980 until now. FML

#20895973
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35756) - you deserved it (3104)

On 09/25/2013 at 7:22pm - work - by Abcporn (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, some asshat chewed me out over a 10 cent late fine he was charged on his library card. When I tried to explain the fine to him, he started mimicking me. Finally, as he chucked a dime at my head before storming out, I saw the glint of a Rolex watch from beneath his power suit. FML

#20894007
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43273) - you deserved it (2875)

On 09/24/2013 at 2:14am - work - by DimeShapedBruise (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I woke up, thinking it was going to be a good day. However, when I looked at my phone, I saw that my girlfriend had sent me an obscene number of angry messages, which are still coming in, because I forgot to say goodnight to her last night. FML

#20883830
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48917) - you deserved it (7673)

On 09/16/2013 at 3:08pm - love - by Jake - United States (Oregon)

Today, a lady stormed into the pharmacy I work at and chewed me out because the medicine I sold her the day before gave her horrible diarrhea as a "side effect". I checked, and it was the medicine she asked for - laxatives. FML

#20883379
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46468) - you deserved it (2449)

On 09/16/2013 at 1:35am - health - by anonymous - United States (Oregon)

Today, my girlfriend is upset with me for not wanting to sext. I can't sext with her because she adds 'lol' to everything which turns me off. FML

#20879249
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53713) - you deserved it (6242)

On 09/13/2013 at 2:53am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Oregon)

Today, I noticed that my car's passenger-side door has cobwebs all over it. FML

#20876882
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41887) - you deserved it (6527)

On 09/11/2013 at 10:16am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I had to finally accept that I have an eating disorder when I caught myself checking for the nutrition facts and calories on my shampoo. FML

#20864106
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40322) - you deserved it (8014)

On 09/02/2013 at 2:47am - health - by Jasmine_smilee - United States (Oregon)

Today, my neighbor's daughter started learning how to play the trombone. FML

#20857611
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41739) - you deserved it (4918)

On 08/28/2013 at 6:33am - kids - by Alice (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, after I had watched a few videos of myself, I realized the sound of my own voice is the single most annoying thing I have ever heard. FML

#20847659
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45532) - you deserved it (5437)

On 08/21/2013 at 10:08am - misc - by shut_up (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I went camping with my family. While I was using the shower house, my sister decided it'd be hilarious to run off with my clothes and towel. I ran back to the camper, completely naked, only for my parents to bitch me out for streaking. FML

#20803187
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44547) - you deserved it (3401)

On 07/25/2013 at 4:33pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I asked this really cute girl for her number. I had nothing else on me so I told her to write it on a dollar bill. Later, without thinking, I put it in a vending machine. I freaked out and frantically pushed the return button. It gave me back quarters. FML

Today, at work, a woman came up to the snack bar and ordered a pretzel with no salt. When I served her the food, she angrily complained about it having no salt, followed by her throwing the whole thing in my face. FML

#20794141
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47138) - you deserved it (3193)

On 07/20/2013 at 1:47pm - work - by YOU KNOW WHAT, FUCK THE CUSTOMER (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I had to break up a fist fight between two female residents. I work in a retirement home. FML

#20791178
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42937) - you deserved it (3187)

On 07/18/2013 at 9:03pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oregon)



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