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FMLs submitted from New York

Today, while in a public bathroom, I threw out my back. A stranger had to help me pull up my pants. FML

#20563612
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30784) - you deserved it (2230)

On 03/28/2013 at 9:52am - health - by paulinapo - United States (New York)

Today, after getting a new haircut, I decided to take a few photos. I set up my iPhone in my room and began posing. It wasn't until numerous shots later that I realized my phone had posted every picture to Facebook, and they were all over everyone's newsfeed. FML

#20561054
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15429) - you deserved it (39654)

On 03/26/2013 at 2:31pm - misc - by anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, after I had changed my number to get away from my abusive ex, my mom decided to give him my new one. She insists that I need to give him another chance. FML

#20556707
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44974) - you deserved it (2134)

On 03/23/2013 at 4:15pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, my department found out that we're getting a new supervisor for the third time this month. I joked about how we're like "the foster kid nobody wants." One of my coworkers burst into tears and ran off. I later found out that she had been a foster child and never once had a stable home. FML

#20550513
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31899) - you deserved it (26054)

On 03/19/2013 at 5:59am - work - by Luke - United States (New York)

Today, I attended the reading of my grandfather's will. I didn't expect to receive anything, since his side of the family had always ostracized me for being born out of wedlock. I did get something: $3,500, on the binding condition that I use a portion of it to get a vasectomy. FML

#20543737
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33414) - you deserved it (2445)

On 03/14/2013 at 6:04pm - misc - by grandson of a p.o.s. (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I had a job interview. I didn't have any clothes suitable for the interview, so I went to the store early and bought some there. After the interview, I went to return the clothes, because they were so expensive. The hiring manager saw me. FML

#20541999
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13426) - you deserved it (35762)

On 03/13/2013 at 12:14pm - money - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, I stole a pen from the doctor's office while she wasn't looking. Later on at work, I idly pulled the pen out during a meeting. My colleague looked at me, horrified. The pen had the words "minimally invasive gynecological surgery" emblazoned on it. I'm a man. FML

#20516811
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6081) - you deserved it (42186)

On 02/21/2013 at 9:56pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I discovered that when you suddenly get channels that you didn't have before, it doesn't mean there was a glitch and you're getting free TV, it just means that your son called the cable company and had your plan changed so you get every conceivable channel at a hugely increased price. FML

#20515174
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30052) - you deserved it (4388)

On 02/20/2013 at 5:55pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I went in to get my first tattoo. I'd put a lot of thought into it and was really excited when the day came. Long story short, the Celtic knot I'd gotten turned out to have an alternate meaning of "female sex slave." The faces my very Irish family made were beyond words. FML

#20511821
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12109) - you deserved it (31332)

On 02/18/2013 at 3:50am - intimacy - by UnluckyInk (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, after being in the hospital for 2 weeks after emergency abdominal surgery, my girlfriend, who didn't even bother to ask how I was, made me hobble to her house just to dump me and send me straight back home. FML

#20511268
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29942) - you deserved it (1626)

On 02/17/2013 at 8:28pm - love - by noname - United States (New York)

Today, my girlfriend and I decided to take a jog in an area we never been before. We then got lost. She actually thought that the tattoo on her arm of an open compass with north, east, south, and west would help us. FML

#20510517
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26812) - you deserved it (5130)

On 02/17/2013 at 9:27am - misc - by omgstuupidd - United States (New York)

Today, I unknowingly bought a house next to a former toxic waste dump. I found out by reading an article in the paper where residents are claiming that they are experiencing cancer and birth defects. FML

#20503049
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25463) - you deserved it (5989)

On 02/11/2013 at 11:18pm - health - by toxic waste - United States (New York)

Today, I was walking with my friend. The girl in front of us had a really nice ass, so I turned to my friend and said, "Damn, she has a perfect ass." He replied, "That's a guy." FML

#20502853
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9310) - you deserved it (31372)

On 02/11/2013 at 9:30pm - misc - by notgay (man) - United States (New York)



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