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FMLs submitted from Nevada

Today, I found out what sound a hammer makes when it strikes the back of my hand. FML

#14220406
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27820) - you deserved it (5754)

On 12/16/2010 at 1:32am - health - by nukebroadcast - United States (Nevada)

Today, my toddler stood up in a shopping cart and fell, giving himself a black eye. Later, while at a restaurant, he tried to stand up in his high-chair. I quickly blurted out, "Sit down! Do you want another one of those?" while pointing at his eye. The waiter wouldn’t stop glaring at me. FML

#14209243
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40778) - you deserved it (9616)

On 12/15/2010 at 12:42am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Nevada)

Today, I found out my wife is pregnant. The problem is she convinced me to get a vasectomy two years ago. FML

#14087670
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45356) - you deserved it (3760)

On 12/04/2010 at 8:28pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Nevada)

Today, my girlfriend told me she wanted get to know my mom, so they went off and had a chat. After an hour, I noticed my girlfriend was gone and my mom was waiting for me. Apparently I've been dumped through my mother. FML

#14061487
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31819) - you deserved it (2657)

On 12/02/2010 at 4:50pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Nevada)

Today, I went to the place I signed for yesterday to pay the first month's rent and get my keys. I looked around before I left, and used the toilet. I went back later to show my boyfriend and found the place flooded an inch with water coming from the toilet. It had been flooding for 7 hours. FML

#13798329
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23464) - you deserved it (4380)

On 11/11/2010 at 2:41am - misc - by robbyrabbit (woman) - United States (Nevada)

Today, I was on a bench enjoying the sun, when a guy comes and sits next to me. Next thing I know, he lets out a loud fart, then looks my way with pride. I stare back in shock. He then says to me, "Yeah, that just happened," and walks off. FML

#13697892
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60572) - you deserved it (12815)

On 11/03/2010 at 3:27am - misc - by flying13 (woman) - United States (Nevada)

Today, I gave my two weeks notice at work. My boss sighed with relief and muttered, "Thank God." FML

#13433715
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22779) - you deserved it (5952)

On 10/13/2010 at 12:42pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Nevada)

Today, I got in an argument with my boyfriend, who recently had to move away, about not calling enough. Apparently his moving had meant that we were now taking a break, he just forgot to talk it over with me. He still wants to visit, and keep the relationship in bed alive though. FML

#13153251
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25228) - you deserved it (3857)

On 09/22/2010 at 4:17am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Nevada)

Today, my girlfriend of a year and I had sex for the first time in several weeks due to relationship problems; I came in less than 10 seconds. We're still having problems. FML

#12641347
227 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23610) - you deserved it (28021)

On 08/20/2010 at 5:51am - intimacy - by pathetic (man) - United States (Nevada)

Today, while at my friend's house, I noticed her brother had a bit of an accent. I laughingly said "Is it me or does your little brother have an accent?" She stared and replied with "No, he has autism." FML

#12473698
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14790) - you deserved it (44168)

On 08/12/2010 at 7:00am - misc - by kggggg - United States (Nevada)

Today, I realized that my baby stops crying loudly whenever I turn on the vacuum cleaner. I'm either stuck with a fussy baby all day, or the roaring sound of a vacuum cleaner. FML

#10521391
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26024) - you deserved it (4930)

On 05/14/2010 at 1:01am - misc - by superhero1043 (woman) - United States (Nevada)

Today, my boyfriend of a year dumped me. In my opinion, the relationship was going so well and I really thought we loved each other. When I asked why, he told me he never loved me. He just wanted to get in my pants which after a year of refusing, he finally did. FML

#9138993
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28947) - you deserved it (5566)

On 03/16/2010 at 7:08pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Nevada)

Today, I was in a movie when my boyfriend sent out a mass text saying that he'd just lost his virginity. FML

#9104990
254 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39271) - you deserved it (3853)

On 03/15/2010 at 3:34pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Nevada)



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