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FMLs submitted from Nevada

Today, I walked in on my husband having sex with the shower wall. When I got in the shower with him he immediately went soft. FML

#21466295
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26356) - you deserved it (2808)

On 09/08/2015 at 10:00pm - intimacy - by Mrs. Ned - United States (Nevada)

Today, I told my boyfriend about how I'm self-conscious about my B-cup breasts. About 20 minutes later, he pointed to another girl with a small chest and said, "See, you're not the only one with small tits!" FML

#21466220
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21330) - you deserved it (2706)

On 09/08/2015 at 6:33pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Nevada)

Today, my friend and I were getting picked up by his dad after a carnival. As I put my stuff in the back of the car and shut the door to walk around to get in the other side, his dad drove off, thinking I was in the car, leaving me to walk up their hill. It was midnight and I ended up lost. FML

#21455882
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24137) - you deserved it (2120)

On 08/14/2015 at 5:08am - misc - by jonloran - United States (Nevada)

Today, I posted on Facebook about a cooking mishap I had. My fiancé and ex then spent the next hour trading stories of my other kitchen disasters in the comments. FML

#21454739
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23488) - you deserved it (5196)

On 08/11/2015 at 10:29am - love - by Frozen Food Fan - United States (Nevada)

Today, a kid on a bike passed me and commented on my "big fat butt." Recognizing him from the neighborhood, I told my husband to go speak to his parents about the inappropriate comment. It turns out his father is the man who yesterday commented on my "big bouncing tits." FML

#21454460
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23723) - you deserved it (2219)

On 08/10/2015 at 8:32pm - misc - by Mrs. W. (woman) - United States (Nevada)

Today, I finally finished downloading a 60GB TV series after two weeks of waiting. Every single "episode" turned out to be Rick Astley singing Never Gonna Give You Up, on constant repeat. I almost respect the prankster's effort enough to not want to gut him like a fish. Almost. FML

#21439737
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28850) - you deserved it (7923)

On 07/10/2015 at 8:52pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Nevada)

Today, I found out the only reason why a friend of mine even bothered talking to me. He thought that I'd sleep with him if he was nice enough. FML

#21437177
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26745) - you deserved it (2658)

On 07/06/2015 at 1:30am - intimacy - by I'm_Not_Interested - United States (Nevada)

Today, my girlfriend came over to meet my parents. Everything was going fine until she said she owned a dog. My mom then immediately attempted to check her scalp for lice. FML

#21407053
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29044) - you deserved it (2013)

On 05/09/2015 at 12:10am - misc - by sarahmaxine - United States (Nevada)

Today, a drunk man started yelling at the lamppost outside my house, demanding to be let inside, all while my neighbors watched. That man is my dad. FML

#21402962
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28785) - you deserved it (2336)

On 05/01/2015 at 4:02pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Nevada)

Today, I found the eggshells from the nest belonging to the little bird that lives outside my house. They were covered in blood and it was quite obvious that they had been eaten. While I was looking at them, the mother bird came over and attacked me. FML

#21402034
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29424) - you deserved it (3425)

On 04/29/2015 at 10:08pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Nevada)

Today, my mom got drunk and started crying at my after-wedding party, after promising she'd behave herself. She thinks my husband is an awful person who'll drag me into a life of sin, all because he has a tattoo and an ear piercing. FML

#21379352
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28373) - you deserved it (2714)

On 03/22/2015 at 5:52am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Nevada)

Today, I thought I had carbon monoxide poisoning because I had the symptoms and my detector was going off. I called the fire dept, they checked me, they checked my apartment. My apartment is fine; I'm just out of shape, have high blood pressure, and don't know how to work simple electronics. FML

#21367736
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31323) - you deserved it (10588)

On 03/04/2015 at 12:12am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Nevada)

Today, a model I've been working on for an art competition was declined. They thought I was being insensitive and "rudely glorifying 9/11". My model was about the ending scene of King Kong. I spent twenty hours on that model. FML

#21357798
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29699) - you deserved it (2809)

On 02/17/2015 at 1:39am - misc - by Swatted - United States (Nevada)



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