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FMLs submitted from Minnesota

Today, I fell asleep while on the toilet at work. When I woke up, I tried to quietly sneak back to my desk, only to be caught by my boss. He immediately sent me packing and gave his "best wishes" for me in the unemployment line. FML

#19835247
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8554) - you deserved it (26067)

On 06/23/2012 at 6:21pm - work - by XoXonedirectionXoXo (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I was at work when a co-worker decided it would be funny to email me from my boss's computer to tell me I had been laid off. It wasn't funny when I was fired for real after "skipping work without giving notice." FML

#19805072
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25337) - you deserved it (1777)

On 06/18/2012 at 12:39am - work - by Adam Jensen - United States (Minnesota)

Today, as part of my medical anatomy course, I had to give a presentation about an STD and the effects it has on women. The class was comprised almost entirely of girls. I become extremely anxious and accidentally stated "Vaginas are smelly" as my opening statement. FML

#19637447
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12994) - you deserved it (23306)

On 05/17/2012 at 4:14pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, it was snowing, and the campus looked just lovely. I sat on a nearby window ledge to enjoy the view. I was joined by a girl who looked fascinated as well, so I decided to make small talk. She nodded, smiled wistfully, and said, "There's herpes in the air today." FML

#19525973
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17606) - you deserved it (1848)

On 04/25/2012 at 2:22am - intimacy - by intheairtonight (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, my boyfriend gave me acne cream for my birthday. FML

#19495820
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23432) - you deserved it (3902)

On 04/19/2012 at 2:00pm - love - by amber (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I was sleeping in after working a graveyard shift. I awoke to my girlfriend sneaking her stuff out of the house. She planned on leaving her key on my pillow and taking off without any notice whatsoever. FML

#19484961
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19528) - you deserved it (1470)

On 04/17/2012 at 4:53pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, my son had to call me from his school's principal's office because he was disrupting his health class by laughing whenever the teacher said "sex". My son is 16. FML

#19453519
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21633) - you deserved it (3436)

On 04/12/2012 at 12:18am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I had to tell a parent about her son kicking a boy in his class. She blamed me for not watching him. I wasn't watching him because I was turned around to care for another boy he had hit right before that. FML

#19316250
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20844) - you deserved it (1447)

On 03/20/2012 at 8:23pm - kids - by LadyJ (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I faked a sore throat for the school nurse so I could go home early. It took my dad the rest of the school day just to get there to pick me up. FML

#19307115
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7386) - you deserved it (40258)

On 03/19/2012 at 12:28pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I hugged my dog and kissed her on the side of the face. She responded by mauling me across my own face. FML

#19265629
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15143) - you deserved it (7661)

On 03/12/2012 at 5:45pm - misc - by anonamous - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I found out my mom has been stealing from me to pay for Scientology courses. FML

#19134973
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24629) - you deserved it (1816)

On 02/21/2012 at 10:14pm - misc - by sonofanut - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I realized that with all the money I've spent on repairs for my iPhone through the months, I could have bought a phone that doesn't die horribly whenever I so much as give it a mean look. FML

#19108975
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7888) - you deserved it (20313)

On 02/18/2012 at 5:07pm - money - by anonymous - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I admitted my fear of small spaces to my boyfriend. His response was to immediately lock me in the hall closet. FML

#18918439
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23566) - you deserved it (3922)

On 01/26/2012 at 6:50pm - health - by Bailyboo (woman) - United States (Minnesota)



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