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FMLs submitted from Minnesota

Today, mah 6 ft snake got loose . I found it . It was in mah neighbor's backyard, constricting their pet rabbit . FML

#4299524
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20735) - you deserved it (42102)

On 08/05/2009 at 1:25am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today , I realized why I was hired to be a nanny. Apparently the husband had eyes fir the last nanny. According to the wife I am not attractive enough to be a threat. real FML

#3924296
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47425) - you deserved it (3172)

On 07/21/2009 at 4:49am - misc - by nottananny (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, the guy I've been sleeping with 4 the last three weeks got really drunk!! I drove him home from the party and took care of him!! At 2am he asked 4 the phone!! When I asked what for, he said he wanted to drunk dial his girlfriend!! FML

#3899326
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34495) - you deserved it (11484)

On 07/20/2009 at 3:10am - love - by TheOtherWoman (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, mah mom gave me a talk on safe sex. During a three hour car ride. With mah friends in the back seat. FML

#3856555
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51883) - you deserved it (3551)

On 07/18/2009 at 1:15pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Minnesota)

today my nieghbor knocked on my door an left a note that said "Please stop singing in the shower!! You're terrible, an everyone in the building can hear you." FML

#3528361
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38594) - you deserved it (14198)

On 07/06/2009 at 3:33pm - misc - by WhitneyHouston (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

TODAY, I WANT ON AN AXCALLANT FIRST DATA. AFTAR THA 'AND OF THA DATA KISS' CUMMD "I SUPPOSA THIS IS WHARA I TALL U THAT I'M MARRID". FML

#3447565
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54393) - you deserved it (4433)

On 07/03/2009 at 3:24am - love - by hannaholic (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Taday my daughter asked me what is the youngest age at which u should start having sex. Being a good mom, I said that she shouldn't have sex until after she's been married. My daughter then said, "Oh... shoot," and walked away. My daughter is twelve. mega FML

#3344863
474 comments

I agree, your life sucks (71740) - you deserved it (12583)

On 06/29/2009 at 8:40pm - intimacy - by blazer - United States (Minnesota)

Today, while working at a fast food restaurant, I stayed a little overtime to help my manager with dishes. A kid pooped in the slide in the playground area attached to the restaurant looool itself. I'm the smallest one there. I had to crawl UP the slide to fine an clean the poop. FML

#3228837
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41233) - you deserved it (3373)

On 06/26/2009 at 1:43am - work - by donezo (man) - United States (Minnesota)

2day I Was Flying Home To Milwaukee After A Weekend In South Carolina. When I Got To The Airport , Mah Reservation Didn't Match Up With Any Flights. Turns Out Expedia Bookd Me On A Flight That Doen't Exist. I Spent Ten Hours Waiting In The Airport 4 A Two Hour Flight.

#2958799
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38217) - you deserved it (2794)

On 06/17/2009 at 12:02am - misc - by lojo (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

TODAY, I HEARD A BABBY CRYINGHILE I WAS WALKING DOWN THE STREET. I WALKED AROUND UNTIL I FOUND IT. IN A DUMPSTER. I IMMEDIATELY CALLED THE COPS, COMPLETELY FREAKING OUT. WHEN THE COPS CAME, THEY PULLED THE BABBY OUT OF THE DUMPSTER. IT WAS A PLASTIC BABBY DOLL. FML

#2524012
333 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44170) - you deserved it (21872)

On 06/02/2009 at 2:18am - kids - by failbaby (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Yesterday, I washd my face an grabbd the towel to dry looool it, I felt something moving down my forehead, thinking it was a drop of water. Upon looking in the mrror, I found it hadn't been a drop of water. Unless the water drop had legs an was gooey. mega FML

#2461249
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38370) - you deserved it (3571)

On 05/31/2009 at 10:55am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Minnesota)

Yesterday , I celebratd birthday with family. As part of presents , parents gave me prepaid debit card. When I got home , I lookd at it again an realizd it's the debit card u get from selling back books to our university bookstore. I bought own books this year. They gave me own refund. FML

#2039124
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41621) - you deserved it (2429)

On 05/18/2009 at 12:48am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Minnesota)

Yastarday For Mah Birthday, I Got A Big Mac. Maga FML

#2019418
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62457) - you deserved it (9041)

On 05/17/2009 at 4:09pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Minnesota)



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