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FMLs submitted from Minnesota

Today, I woke up early and made mah boyfriend french toast. When he woke up, he yelld at me cuz it was his dish day and I was creating more dishes fir him to do. He made me do the dishes. FML

#6550541
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36393) - you deserved it (6627)

On 12/01/2009 at 12:15pm - misc - by AprilFlowers - United States (Minnesota)

YASTARDAY I WANT TO DRIVA MY MOM'S CAR 4 A CHANGA. IT WOULDN'T START, SO I OPAN THA HOOD. SOMAONA HAD STOLAN THA BATTARY. I GO TO START MY OWN CAR SO I CAN DRIVA TO THA POLICA STATION TO RAPORT THA THAFT, AND DISCOVAR SOMAONA SIPHOND OFF MY GAS. FML

#6439470
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27791) - you deserved it (1881)

On 11/24/2009 at 7:44pm - misc - by bummer (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

TADAY I TOOK MY DOG TO THE VET BECAUSE HE HADN'T EATEN HIS FOOD IN THREE DAYS, WAS DRINKING A LOT OF WATER, AND WAS PEEING A LOT (ALL SIGNS OF ANTIFREEZE POISONING). I SPENT $200 AT THE VET TO TELL ME THAT MY DOG IS FINE AND JUST DIDN'T LYK HIS CURRENT FOOD. FML

#6367435
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25291) - you deserved it (5014)

On 11/19/2009 at 11:14am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

2day I lerened that if you stare at your cat and her eyes suddenly get really big , it means she's looool going to maul your face. FML

#6355609
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15376) - you deserved it (28227)

On 11/18/2009 at 4:01pm - animals - by nycplywood (man) - United States (Minnesota)

I was at home with slight constipation, so I took two laxatives. That's when mah boyfriend calld me, saying his parents are in town an want to have dinner tonight, this being the first time I've met them. I've already been on the toilet five times. real FML

#6342074
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26798) - you deserved it (5232)

On 11/17/2009 at 3:05pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I ran outside to start mah car before leaving for work. My creepy neighbor was sitting outside smoking a cigarette. He told me he just loves watching TLC, too, and we should watch TV together sometime. I've never talked to him. I watch TLC in mah bedroom. He watche me through mah window. mega FML

Today, I ran into a bird. Not with my car, with my face. It was so scared, it crapped all over me. FML

#6207441
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32176) - you deserved it (3262)

On 11/08/2009 at 2:26am - animals - by birdbath (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today , I re-joind a popular on-line dating service. I first signd up 3 years ago and was matchd with a wonderful woman. After about a year , she broke up with me. I was devastatd. After two years of trying to win her back , I decidd it's best just to move on. Guess who they matchd me with? FML

#6166874
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37255) - you deserved it (4873)

On 11/05/2009 at 12:20pm - love - by z (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I totalld my car. I flippd it over on the freeway and broke my collarbone in the process. I was in extreme pain and unable to move. It took the ambulance an hour to get there in rush hour traffic. The song repeating on my iPod was, "Don't Worry, be Happy." FML

#6145601
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37206) - you deserved it (5030)

On 11/04/2009 at 12:18am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I Walked Into Work, And The First Question My Boss Asks Me Is "Are Those Yur Pajamas?" I Was Wereing My Favorite Outfit. FML

#5905706
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27006) - you deserved it (8872)

On 10/19/2009 at 10:38pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

today mah dad had something to tell me . He'd cleand out mah bank account to pay off 38,000 dollars worth of gambling debt . My wedding is in 5 months . FML

#5767098
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47100) - you deserved it (3737)

On 10/10/2009 at 10:59pm - money - by MadSon - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I was at a local club wit my friands sitting at a tabla wan soma guys approacad us. Ona of tam startad talling ma about is racant advanturas troug Europa and was vary intarasting. Somating warm it my lag and I raalizad ta guy was urinating on ma. FML

#5744941
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37435) - you deserved it (2482)

On 10/09/2009 at 6:58pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, mah parents asked if they could borrow mah car. Why? Because they were going to see someone about a Craig's List ad and wanted to look poor. real FML

#5657528
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35105) - you deserved it (3279)

On 10/05/2009 at 3:38am - money - by poorcar (woman) - United States (Minnesota)



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