FMLs submitted from Massachusetts

Today, after spending all day begging my husband to stop playing video games and show me some attention, I finally fell asleep out of boredom. As soon as I did, he shut the game off and went to hang out with our neighbor. FML

by megsterr413 / 05/27/2016 at 12:45am / United States (Massachusetts) / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was sitting on my couch when I felt something weird underneath me. I got up, thinking I'd sat on my phone or something. Wrong. I'd sat on a live mouse. FML

by goldenpuppy / 05/19/2016 at 4:54pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Animals

Today, I got my grades back. I got a very poor evaluation for my lit class, which was odd because it didn't match the impression from my end-of-class meeting with the professor. It does, however, include a nod to the supposedly-anonymous negative class review I gave her, though. FML

by Anonymous / 05/18/2016 at 1:51pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Work

Today, I woke up to hear dripping water in the kitchen. Thinking it was someone getting a glass of water or something, I came out to find that it was just a mouse drowning in my dog's water bowl. FML

by ShouldIHelpIt / 05/17/2016 at 10:46pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Animals

Today, the only part of my Psychology final that I was 100% confident in was my name. FML

by canwesayfail / 05/17/2016 at 10:20pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Work

Today, I had a mini heart attack as my dad stopped in the middle of the street and said, "I wonder what'd happen if I just dropped my pants right now and started jerking it in front of all these motherfuckers." FML

by dad, please / 05/16/2016 at 1:37am / United States (Massachusetts) / Intimacy

Today, my girlfriend changed our cable subscription to include MTV. This made us lose the only channel I care about: HBO. Goodbye Game of Thrones, hello Teen Mom. FML

by Bloop / 05/13/2016 at 8:58pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous

Today, my dentist pulled the wrong tooth. FML

by Fox_Undercover / 04/30/2016 at 4:33pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Health

Today, my wife and I are planning a simple team meal for our son's team. We're stuck on pulled pork or meatballs. I've told her I don't care. She's still indecisive. This has been going on for 2 days. We're now not talking, over meatballs. FML

by Wyomingwannbe / 04/30/2016 at 7:25am / United States (Massachusetts) / Love

Today, I worked as a cashier at a rummage sale at my church to raise money for the homeless. My bag was stolen. FML

by TheHeirofTime / 04/29/2016 at 8:38pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, a student pooped his pants in my office. I work with undergrad and graduate students. FML

by AcademicAdvisor / 04/25/2016 at 4:14pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Work

Today, my husband cheated on me. In my house. While I was home. FML

by Why / 04/24/2016 at 2:59pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous

Today, my daughter had a vocabulary assignment. She had to find five new words in books and movies. She was watching Shrek, so her first word was "thong". FML

by Anonymous / 04/22/2016 at 8:33pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Kids