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FMLs submitted from Kentucky

Today, I was giving a tour on campus when one of my friends approached us and said "Don't go here, the weed's too expensive." and walked away. Thinking he's coming back to say he's joking, he instead say "i'm just kidding its really cheap" and walked away. I may or may not still have a job. FML

#920019
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43163) - you deserved it (4401)

On 04/11/2009 at 10:51pm - misc - by JimmyJazzNJ (man) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, my boss informed me that it is now my responsibility to wash the dishes, since my co-workers are consistently too lazy to clean up after themselves. I have a bachelor's degree. Which I earned at the same university I now work at. FML

#866352
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46845) - you deserved it (5335)

On 04/08/2009 at 2:08am - work - by aeterne (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, my girl and I were in bed trying to nap before class. She kept tossing and turning, obvious signs that she was having no luck. Sweetly, I ask her if there was anything I could do to help her relax. She says "you can tell me a story about your day, that always puts me to sleep". FML

#723787
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48420) - you deserved it (5885)

On 03/31/2009 at 1:23pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I was at my boyfriends house and we were having sex. He has a game on in the background and one of his friends started talking to him. He immediately threw me off and said "I have to answer this." He went over to his computer and started talking to them. FML

Today, my mother asked me if my boyfriend and I were getting serious. I quickly lied and said no. She then informed me that if things ever heated up that she would take me to get birthcontrol. Wanting birthcontrol, I confessed. In turn she grounded me. I am not allowed to see my boyfriend anymore. FML

#602653
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55170) - you deserved it (23637)

On 03/25/2009 at 4:40pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I was pulled over by my father who is a police officer. He was training a rookie and gave me a breathalyzer test to show his trainee how to do it. I blew a .15 and was taken to jail. FML

#483516
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31718) - you deserved it (128559)

On 03/20/2009 at 1:48am - misc - by Jesse (man) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I was eating at Steak N' Shake. I noticed that the cute waitress was checking me out. When I was done with my meal she wrote her number on the ticket. So, as I was walking out the door, I turned around to wave at her, and walked into a metal bar next to the door. FML

#333270
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45122) - you deserved it (21772)

On 03/15/2009 at 12:20am - love - by Raw95 (man) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I had the cops called on me because I accidentally texted "I'm going to kill you and use your head as hood ornament" to my ex-fiancé, instead of my best friend. I only texted that because he got a better grade on an exam than me. Now I have a court date. FML

#133313
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26607) - you deserved it (38402)

On 02/25/2009 at 2:05pm - misc - by Joe (man) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I saw a girl texting at school. I told her she might want to put her phone away before she got a detention. She turned around and I saw she was changing her insulin level on her pump. She has diabetes. FML

#112568
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9919) - you deserved it (48563)

On 02/23/2009 at 9:41am - health - by kcd (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I'm playing basketball with my little brother. After jokingly blocking his shot, he turns to me and says "You're a bitch." He's 6. After asking where he heard that word, he responded with "Daddy calls you that when you're not around." FML

#112335
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (136141) - you deserved it (11002)

On 02/23/2009 at 7:51am - kids - by lifesucks4me - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I walked out of the bathroom when two guys were checking me out and said "nice tail" I smiled and strutted to my next class. When I was about to sit down in my desk, the girl behind me said "did you know you have toilet paper hanging out of your pants?" FML

#79347
25 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14600) - you deserved it (30140)

On 02/19/2009 at 4:11pm - misc - by Christen (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, was the first time I had sex with a guy I really like. I took off my shirt and my bra and he said "wow, that's disappointing." FML

#69472
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (100228) - you deserved it (9008)

On 02/18/2009 at 4:14pm - intimacy - by notsohappy (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I was secretly listening to a voicemail from my mom in maths class when I accidentally hit the speaker phone button. My whole math class now knows I have a gyno appointment at 9:45 on March 11. FML

#67507
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11746) - you deserved it (41064)

On 02/18/2009 at 10:43am - misc - by Noname (woman) - United States (Kentucky)



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