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FMLs submitted from Indiana

Today, I took a nap. My boyfriend took this opportunity to go over to his "beautiful" and "amazing" ex-girlfriend's house to help her clean out her pool. I told him I didn't think that was appropriate. He told me I don't value relationships and didn't come home tonight. FML

#21429410
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23408) - you deserved it (2067)

On 06/21/2015 at 6:16am - love - by bev_rogan - United States (Indiana)

Today, I was on a date with a girl and everything was going great. As I took her back to her house and walked her to her door I leaned in for a kiss. She seemed to really enjoy it so I went for another but as I leaned in again, I sneezed uncontrollably shooting her face with saliva and snot. FML

#21429236
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26452) - you deserved it (3683)

On 06/20/2015 at 9:59pm - love - by hotheadslav - United States (Indiana)

Today, I realized I'm pregnant by a man who won't even accept my Facebook friend request. FML

#21429134
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22358) - you deserved it (17900)

On 06/20/2015 at 4:54pm - misc - by happycow122 (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, at work a customer bitched me out for not explicitly telling her that our peanut butter pancakes contain real peanut butter. She's threatening to sue because she's allergic to peanuts. FML

#21420888
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27544) - you deserved it (1803)

On 06/04/2015 at 9:07pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Indiana)

Today, I made a nursing home resident laugh so hard that he had a heart attack. FML

#21420106
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30482) - you deserved it (2782)

On 06/03/2015 at 6:15am - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I found out my dog's new favorite game to play: "If you don't stop petting me, I'll bite your balls as hard as I can." FML

Today, I was looking at old pictures with my mom and saw one of myself crying in kindergarten. I asked why I was crying. She said that was the day a boy kissed me on the cheek, and I thought I'd gotten pregnant. She then decided to give me the sex talk. FML

#21416031
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30036) - you deserved it (2954)

On 05/26/2015 at 11:40am - intimacy - by shitty shit - United States (Indiana)

Today, I had to ask one of my coworkers if we were supposed to return a client's teeth to her. I work at a jewellery store. FML

#21413953
30 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23219) - you deserved it (1878)

On 05/22/2015 at 11:02am - work - by grossedout (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, in my film class, we were watching Schindler's List. At least, we tried. The moron next to me kept interrupting the most intense scenes with a very loud, "I don't get it." Not only did she break the focus of the class, but we had to keep stopping the movie to explain it to her. FML

#21412612
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24906) - you deserved it (1562)

On 05/19/2015 at 3:53pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I surprised my 7 and 1.5 year old girls with a princess dinner. I quickly realized it was a scam when the "princesses" arrived looking more suited to a bachelor party. I was able to quickly get the girls out, but have spent the evening explaining why Pocahontas was heavily tattooed. FML

Today, my husband wants me to apologize for getting angry when his father told me I'm getting so fat that I look like a whale. I'm not fat, I'm just 8 months pregnant. FML

#21403055
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31829) - you deserved it (2692)

On 05/01/2015 at 6:57pm - misc - by wtf - United States (Indiana)

Today, I was called a fascist and accused of being "racist" against poor people, all because some crazy meth-mouthed bitch couldn't afford some booze and expected me to cut the price by almost 40% so she could. FML

#21392314
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27308) - you deserved it (1866)

On 04/12/2015 at 11:18am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, in my online class I accidentally unmuted my mic. Normally that would be fine except today I decided to serenade myself with a silly song. I didn't realize until everyone started clapping at the end of the song. FML

#21373396
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27602) - you deserved it (6307)

On 03/12/2015 at 8:39pm - misc - by acapelladisaster - United States (Indiana)



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