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FMLs submitted from California

Today, my boyfriend's dad helped me put coolant in my car. When I said I wished I could do something in return, he told me to get an abortion so I wouldn't "ruin" his son's life. When I told my boyfriend, he didn't believe me. FML

#21444969
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26943) - you deserved it (2510)

On 07/21/2015 at 11:17am - misc - by father-in-nope (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my religious friend and I ended up having wild sex in the back of his mom's minivan. We got interrupted by a priest knocking at our window. Well played God, well played. FML

#21444515
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28007) - you deserved it (7726)

On 07/20/2015 at 1:48pm - intimacy - by Marika - United States (California)

Today, I was fired from my dream job for being pregnant. Apparently, you can't teach children while growing one inside you. FML

#21444439
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32068) - you deserved it (2276)

On 07/20/2015 at 10:29am - work - by mrsmahdi - United States (California)

Today, the AC broke at work. I work in a hotel and every single guest asked me if I knew how hot it was in the lobby. It was 96 degrees for 7 hours. I definitely knew. FML

Today, I received a text with my last name spelled wrong. A short conversation revealed he got my number from me, through Tinder. I don't have an account, but he insisted he knew that I like it 'hard and rough'. He knew my first name. I still don't know how he got my phone number or name. FML

#21444252
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25625) - you deserved it (1937)

On 07/19/2015 at 11:00pm - intimacy - by creepedout (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend thought it'd be hilarious to secretly swap her and my mom's numbers in my phone, then sexually tease me before going to work. I found out about the prank when I texted my "girlfriend", saying I was going to fuck her so hard she wouldn't walk straight for days. FML

#21443815
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30904) - you deserved it (4281)

On 07/19/2015 at 12:36am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, my son was planning on going clubbing. I disapproved, but no matter what I say he never listens, so I simply offered him some condoms so he doesn't end up knocking anyone up. He just said, "Nah, dad. Get 'em drunk enough and it's anal all the way." FML

#21443327
221 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29323) - you deserved it (4523)

On 07/18/2015 at 1:00am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, a girl called me a racist, stereotyping asshole. All I did was ask a kid who happens to be Asian to tutor me in math. Which I didn't do just because he's Asian, but rather because he's in college and is actually a brilliant mathematician. FML

#21443245
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27938) - you deserved it (1934)

On 07/17/2015 at 10:26pm - misc - by yep, she does have a tumblr (man) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend told me I looked nice in my profile picture. I began to reply "Aww, thank you!" until he sent another message saying "Mostly because your face isn't in it." FML

#21442569
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23252) - you deserved it (2656)

On 07/16/2015 at 1:03pm - love - by hayleediaz - United States (California)

Today, I agreed to help out with my boyfriend's sister's baby shower. They forgot to inform me that "helping" meant splitting the cost of everything. I now owe his family $275. I don't know how to back out without looking cheap. FML

#21442412
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25772) - you deserved it (2368)

On 07/16/2015 at 2:56am - money - by JustOutofCollegeAndBroke - United States (California)

Today, after working a double shift, I got home to total pandemonium. My dogs had crapped all over the house, my kitchen was soaking wet, etc. My mother, who just moved in with me, was sitting on the couch, saying she had no idea what happened. FML

Today, the guy I've been dating for 3 weeks showed up at my house at 7 AM. I was about to give him a kiss when he said, "Good morning, is Sarah here?" I was confused until I realized he didn't recognize me because I had no make up on. FML

Today, my co-worker handed me the phone and said it was my boyfriend calling, so I answered "Hello, Love!" It was my boss. FML

#21441236
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24227) - you deserved it (3169)

On 07/13/2015 at 9:07pm - work - by Lukey1028 (woman) - United States (California)



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