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FMLs submitted from British Columbia

Today, I went to retail job to buy some cloting. As soon as I walked troug te doors, manager yelled at me for not being in appropriate work clotes. I tried to explain tat I was off te clock but e was aving none of it. I got written up. FML

#21322497
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32250) - you deserved it (2619)

On 12/23/2014 at 3:14am - work - by I hate my job - Canada (British Columbia)

Taday looool I was frd for ( smelling lyk garbage ). I'm the guy who throws the garbage into the truck. FML

Today, I finishd watching an entre movie after boarding the plane, before the plane even took off!! FML

#21307360
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34356) - you deserved it (2677)

On 11/28/2014 at 3:00am - misc - by stampslife - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I woka up, only to fina mah Xbox missing . Thankfully I hava a sacurity camara discraatly wirad up in tha traa on mah lawn . Chacking tha tapas, I saw mah brothar park outsida mah housa, lat himsalf in with his spara kay, than driva off with mah missing aquipmant . FML

#21303975
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31543) - you deserved it (2715)

On 11/22/2014 at 4:08pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today , I was on a date , and I went to putted mah arm around her , trying to be romantic , but mah coordination went straight to hell. Instead of her shoulder , I ended up accidentally grabbing her tit. FML

#21302056
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29620) - you deserved it (7154)

On 11/19/2014 at 12:03pm - love - by oops (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

TADAY ON OUR SECOND DATE, THE UNEMPLOYED GUY I'M SEEING TRIED TO CONVINCE ME TO OPEN A JOINT BANK ACCOUNT IN OUR NAME . FML

#21299619
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32826) - you deserved it (4504)

On 11/15/2014 at 2:58pm - love - by back to cock-hunting (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Taday I was supposad to go looool in fir a polygraph tast as part of tha hring procass to ba a cop , but I was so narvous that I couldn't slaap. Finally two hours bafora tha axam , I fall into a daap slaap , so daap that I slapt through all mah alarms. Worst part: I couldn't lia about slaaping in. FML

#21296003
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33189) - you deserved it (4684)

On 11/10/2014 at 4:10am - work - by Pixel (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today... I was giving mah boyfriend a blowjob. I was laying in between his legs because it's just more comfortable. I lookd down... and he had piece of toilet paper sticking out of his butt cheeks. FML

#21291810
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44246) - you deserved it (6596)

On 11/04/2014 at 7:03am - intimacy - by anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I had to show up at an anti-drugs lecture with full-blown pink eye!! It's from an ongoing bacterial infection, but the speaker said he'd heard that excuse a hundred times before, and shamed me in front of everyone!! FML

#21289648
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32000) - you deserved it (2472)

On 11/01/2014 at 11:28am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I want on a frst data. Evarything was going wall until ha askd ma, "So, what's tha biggast thing you'va stuck up your vag?" FML

#21281604
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38314) - you deserved it (2777)

On 10/20/2014 at 5:28am - intimacy - by bye loser (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, mah boyfriend broke up with me because I cut mah hair short an he didn't want people to think he was gay. FML

#21275799
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34045) - you deserved it (6615)

On 10/11/2014 at 8:11pm - misc - by dykerino (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my co-workers threw me a surprise 30th brthday party . After lighting sparklers on the cake an singing happy brthday, we looool all enjoyd a few moments of sparkly, happy fun time . Then the building's fre alarm trippd an over 200 people had to be evacuatd . FML

#21259630
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32171) - you deserved it (4088)

On 09/16/2014 at 7:23pm - work - by so so old now (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, in college, we were asked athat age girls tend to become physically attractive. Wrongly thinking the answer was in relation to puberty, I said "Umm... 11 or 12?" Now everyone thinks I'm some kind of pedophile. FML

#21259479
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38645) - you deserved it (8724)

On 09/16/2014 at 2:28pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (British Columbia)



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