Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

FMLs submitted from British Columbia

Today, feeling in need of a self-esteem boost, I took what I thought was a good selfie and I put it on Facebook. Out of 500 friends, the only response I got was a picture of Saddam Hussein with the caption, "This is why I bomb people." FML

#21370942
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29393) - you deserved it (7307)

On 03/09/2015 at 2:01am - misc - by why they bomb - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I greeted my girlfriend with a spinning hug. She got motion sickness and threw up all over me. FML

#21362603
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28861) - you deserved it (8292)

On 02/24/2015 at 2:02pm - love - by hamboneghost (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my boyfriend complimented me on how he liked my freckles down below. I didn't have the heart to tell him that they were just razor rash. FML

#21360762
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32094) - you deserved it (4714)

On 02/22/2015 at 12:15am - intimacy - by awkward.. (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my dad still refuses to repay the loan I gave him. I've just barely managed to pay my bills, and I'm now so poor that I'll have to survive the next 3 days until my next paycheck by eating the only thing left in my fridge: a jar of cheese whiz. FML

#21358559
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32920) - you deserved it (3009)

On 02/18/2015 at 12:17pm - money - by janused (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, a police car hit my parked vehicle, likely due to icy road conditions. When the officer came over to talk to me, I assumed it was to give me his insurance information. Nope. It was to give me a ticket for 'impeding a police officer'. My car was in my driveway. FML

#21357102
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41588) - you deserved it (2325)

On 02/16/2015 at 1:01am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, after a day, I finally noticed that the toilet paper I'd been using to wipe my butt is actually a roll of paper towel cut in half. My dad thinks that it's a waste of money to buy proper paper. Guess who had to unclog the toilet twice. FML

#21350771
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28662) - you deserved it (2760)

On 02/06/2015 at 3:26am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I got a wedgie after a workout class. As I was walking, I used my gym bag to discreetly unwedgie it, and then turned around to check that no one was there. The cute guy that I had a crush on last year was right behind me, and by the look on his face, it wasn't discreet. FML

#21349857
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27489) - you deserved it (5188)

On 02/04/2015 at 7:00pm - love - by nooo - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my father was playing with my son and his toy animals. He picked one up and said, "What is this? Some kind of African horse?" It was a zebra. FML

Today, I'm celebrating New Years with my cat. I made her a cake. FML

#21328260
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28444) - you deserved it (6284)

On 01/01/2015 at 12:25am - misc - by HappyNewYearsToMeAndMyCat (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my boyfriend sent me a screenshot of his phone's contact list, to show me the adorable photo of us he'd set as my contact image. I guess he didn't realize that a contact called "Side Babe" was just barely in the screenshot too. FML

#21325257
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37240) - you deserved it (2713)

On 12/27/2014 at 11:54am - love - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I went to my retail job to buy some clothing. As soon as I walked through the doors, my manager yelled at me for not being in appropriate work clothes. I tried to explain that I was off the clock but he was having none of it. I got written up. FML

#21322497
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33417) - you deserved it (2866)

On 12/23/2014 at 3:14am - work - by I hate my job - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was fired for "smelling like garbage". I'm the guy who throws the garbage into the truck. FML

Today, I finished watching an entire movie after boarding the plane, before the plane even took off. FML

#21307360
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35415) - you deserved it (2912)

On 11/28/2014 at 3:00am - misc - by stampslife - Canada (British Columbia)



FML's blog

  • Auntie Bernie replies #1
  • Hello all you crybabies, from Land's End to John o' Groats. Yes, I'm finally here my lovelies. Since last week, my inbox hasn't stopped humming with the noise of new mail dropping into it, letters full…

Friday 31 July 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: