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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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FMLs submitted from British Columbia

Today, I accidentally forwarded a link to a weird fart porn video to my chat group. They've been silent for 30 minutes now. FML

#21523269
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13113) - you deserved it (10018)

On 02/06/2016 at 12:55am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my grandma got drunk, tried to change the TV channel with my Xbox controller, and slurred at me to fuck off when I told her it wasn't the remote. She pulls this kind of crap way too often. FML

#21523258
25 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15589) - you deserved it (1178)

On 02/06/2016 at 12:04am - misc - by sick of this shit (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I received a phone call from my boss, from the other side of the country. It seems the conference I sent him to is actually happening next week. FML

#21520233
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18402) - you deserved it (6381)

On 01/27/2016 at 9:44pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I went to get minor surgery done. I have anxiety and a phobia of needles, so they gave me laughing gas. It gave me a panic attack. FML

Today, I realized how much of an invisible artist I am when I got a little excited when someone stole my art. FML

Today, while walking to work with my best friend, he broke down in tears. I asked what was wrong, and he told me his mom passed away last night. All I could think to do was give him a hug and say I was sorry. Then some assclown walking past said "GAAAYYY!" and walked away laughing hysterically. FML

#21489505
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27311) - you deserved it (1548)

On 11/07/2015 at 8:02am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my boyfriend called. He said he would sing me a song, like I'd wanted for a long time. I was excited, but surprised at his song choice. He sang 'Locked Away' by R. City ft. Adam Levine. Turns out, he was calling me from jail. He thought this was romantic, and expected me to bail him out. FML

Today, I was at work, stocking shelves. A customer got mad because I was in the way of her "shopping time" and knocked down all the work I had done. FML

#21485710
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22459) - you deserved it (1262)

On 10/29/2015 at 4:33am - work - by tired of my job - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my wedding celebration came to an awkward pause when my dad slapped my mom across the face and called her a whore after she admitted to having an affair. FML

#21478146
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30083) - you deserved it (1720)

On 10/10/2015 at 2:39am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, desperate to meet a guy, I went clubbing. The only guy to show any interest opened with: "You're hot, for a black chick!" FML

#21478117
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24540) - you deserved it (2546)

On 10/10/2015 at 12:43am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I told my boyfriend that I love him. He replied, dead serious, "That's nice and all, but anal speaks louder than words." FML

#21477939
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29301) - you deserved it (4137)

On 10/09/2015 at 2:27pm - intimacy - by not impressed (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was confiding in my grandma about how lonely I am and how everything in my life seems to be falling apart. While I was in mid-sentence, she rolled her eyes and made a show of removing her hearing aid. FML

#21470109
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21424) - you deserved it (3010)

On 09/19/2015 at 1:45am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my girlfriend told me she has decided to become a stay-at-home mom for our dog. FML



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