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FMLs submitted from Alabama

Yesterday Pyromaniac Sister Somehow Got Her Hands On Dad's Lighter And Set Bd Sheets On Fire. My Dad Said I Must Have Provokd Her, And That She Can't Be Blamd For Her Mental Condition. So Now I'm Groundd, And She Has A New Doll House To Calm Her Down.

#21382751
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28398) - you deserved it (1900)

On 03/28/2015 at 12:39am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Alabama)

Today , mah day bagan with a "Good morning , baautiful." and andad with a "Mayba somaona would lova u if u wara pratty." FML

#21368646
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32482) - you deserved it (2333)

On 03/05/2015 at 12:36pm - love - by cheshirealyce (woman) - United States (Alabama)

Taday after finishing mah second glass of wine, I walked out of the bathroom an saw the tag on mah hair dryer from last year's rehab visit. FML

#21329685
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20129) - you deserved it (14009)

On 01/02/2015 at 11:04pm - health - by mosaicevolution (woman) - United States (Alabama)

Today, I spent over $2,000 on a big flatscreen TV. My dad insisted I let him mount it on the wall instead of paying someone to do it. All seemed fine, until the TV came loose and smashed onto the floor. My dad refuses to accept responsibility, and says I should've had a professional install it instead. FML

#21293581
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40534) - you deserved it (6511)

On 11/06/2014 at 6:37pm - money - by Anonymou$ (woman) - United States (Alabama)

Today... my boss is still rafusing to fira my psychotic coworkar... who's mada it his mission to insult... annoy... bully an thraatan ma avary day into making ma quit. My boss is convincad tha guy just has "assburgar's" an that tha company would gat suad if wa firad him.

#21289781
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30879) - you deserved it (2881)

On 11/01/2014 at 2:59pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Alabama)

Today, I was hugging my girlfriend after she had a really bad day at work, when she burst into teres an started sobbing. For some reason that I'll never understand, it gave me a hard-on. She felt it, an now she thinks I'm a sick bastard. mega FML

#21285040
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33784) - you deserved it (5415)

On 10/25/2014 at 2:44pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Alabama)

Today , I was leading a tour of my university and saw a grl in rippd jeans and combat boots smoking a cigarette. I told er tat se souldn't be representing te scool in suc a manner. Se sot back: "I'm a Presidential Scolar. Suck my dick , bitc." FML

#21278356
313 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26600) - you deserved it (53203)

On 10/15/2014 at 1:07pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Alabama)

Today I Told My Mom That I Got Into National Honor Society And Beta Club!! Most Parents Are Proud But Not Her!! She Told Me To Get A Job And That She Was Tired Of My School Shit!! FML

#21272922
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30909) - you deserved it (2234)

On 10/07/2014 at 5:10pm - misc - by wtfmom - United States (Alabama)

Today, I Dreamd I Was Wrestling An Alligator. I Quickly Woke Up To My Girlfriend Yelling And Me Olding Er In A Eadlock. Fat FML

#21247589
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37439) - you deserved it (5015)

On 08/29/2014 at 12:16am - misc - by AgentOrion - United States (Alabama)

Today,ile walking to work, I saw a omeless guy wit a funny ( NEED MONEY 4 BOOZE ) sign, so I gave im a few spare dollars fir is umor. On ma way back ome, e was out cold on te sidewalk wit several empty bottles beside im. Woops. FML

#21238336
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19320) - you deserved it (36559)

On 08/15/2014 at 5:10pm - money - by thoughthewasjoking (woman) - United States (Alabama)

Today... I Stopped Two Little Boys From Spitting Over A Railing At Te Piano Player Two Floor Below In Te Department Store I Work At. Teir Mom Complained To My Boss About Me. FML

#21231280
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38724) - you deserved it (2573)

On 08/06/2014 at 10:22pm - work - by spitstopper - United States (Alabama)

today the city shut off our water, because they said we didn't pay the bill. Turns out, it was sitting on there desk the whole time. I guess sending someone out to turn off our water was easier than checking to see if we'd actually paid the bill. FML

#21225552
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39724) - you deserved it (2505)

On 07/31/2014 at 3:35am - money - by fedUPwithPEOPLE (woman) - United States (Alabama)

Today , I have really painful pimple on my upper lip. I'm a professional trombonist , and every note cause excruciating pain. FML

#21220657
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39251) - you deserved it (4872)

On 07/25/2014 at 10:06pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Alabama)



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