FMLs submitted from Akershus

Today, after nearly a month, I found out my wife isn't pregnant after all. She was just screwing around to win a bet with her friends on how long it'd take me to figure out the truth. FML

by Anonymous / 03/04/2014 at 4:06pm / Norway (Akershus) / Love

Today, I had an asthma attack while in bed with my boyfriend. He interrupted my desperate coughing only to tell me to shut up. He then rolled over to go back to sleep. FML

by Anonymous / 08/31/2013 at 4:52pm / Norway (Akershus) / Love

Today, I got an email saying the gift I'd ordered for my boyfriend of three years had been sent. I ordered it a couple of days ago because I thought he needed cheering up. I guess he found a better way of doing so himself; he broke up with me yesterday. FML

by moikristine / 05/21/2013 at 6:24am / Norway (Akershus) / Love

Today, my extremely overweight roommate decided to not only be a nudist, but also to get in shape for his new lifestyle. He's been doing naked lunges in our room for the last twenty minutes. FML

by xXfloatingshitlogXx / 11/03/2012 at 12:04pm / Norway (Akershus) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to the grocery store with three bags full of sausages that I'd drunkenly bought the night before. Even though the manager remembered me, he wouldn't give me a refund, and now I'll be lucky if I can pay my rent this month. FML

by minaaaaajftw / 07/13/2012 at 4:13pm / Norway (Akershus) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was stuck in the car with my grandma for an hour as she described to me how she had looked through my great grandma's poop to make sure her calcium pills were being digested. FML

by painful / 07/24/2011 at 4:55am / Norway (Akershus) / Transportation

Today, I finally found out who has been hacking my email account to send dirty messages to my teacher. My dad. FML

by Charles / 05/18/2011 at 1:13pm / Norway (Akershus) / Miscellaneous

Today, I saw my crush walking on the other side of the street. She hadn't noticed me, so when she did I nonchalantly looked over and casually waved to look cool. I then walked right into a lamp post. FML

by anonymous / 06/18/2009 at 10:04am / Norway (Akershus) / Miscellaneous