Really! By fml - 13/01/2020 07:00 - United States - Huntsville Today, after receiving our marriage certificate, I told my wife about it. She responded with "fml". FML I agree, your life sucks 1 821 You deserved it 250 Share Tweet Share
Today, I confronted my ex-employer about the money he owes me. He'd said he would pay me $3000. He asked me if I had it in writing. I said no. He said, “Well, too bad for you. No leg to stand on.” Then, in a cringey Indian accent, “Thank you, come again!” and slammed the door in my face. FML I agree, your life sucks 421 You deserved it 96
Today, I bought an electric sex toy to make masturbating more interesting. My penis wasn’t long enough to reach the moving massaging parts on the inside, and just pathetically rested a few inches inside the opening. I could call it a bad design but I’d be lying, I just have a small dick. FML I agree, your life sucks 1 890 You deserved it 312
Today, in the spirit of Halloween and to get back at a child who repeatedly pressed the doorbell until I showed up, I quickly opened the door and yelled "Boo!" The child ended up being carried away crying with wet pants by a mother threatening to sue. FML I agree, your life sucks 33 032 You deserved it 5 248
Today, I went to a great concert. Against all odds, I got to meet the band. All I had for them to autograph was a flyer protesting their concert that was given to me on the way in. FML I agree, your life sucks 29 367 You deserved it 5 703
Today, I went over to my friend's house. After knocking on the door, I was greeted by her hairy, 300+ pound father in his underwear. He then hugged me. FML I agree, your life sucks 33 703 You deserved it 3 243
Today, I’m teaching French in a university in India. One of the students asked me if Paris was the only city in France. FML I agree, your life sucks 624 You deserved it 69
Today, I was able to check my voicemail and email for the first time in two weeks. The only message I got was from my landlord telling me that the house I'm renting is in foreclosure, and I needed to have all my stuff out in ten days. He left the message nine days ago. FML I agree, your life sucks 43 309 You deserved it 5 787
Today, at school, I was trying to pee in the stall, but I couldn't. I repeatedly pushed my bladder. Unfortunately, I didn't realize a number of things. My stall was open, I made noises from frustration, and I looked like I was jacking off. When I gave up, somebody clapped and yelled, "FINALLY!" FML I agree, your life sucks 18 013 You deserved it 51 351