By punkiebrew - 16/1/2021 02:01 Bacon lovers unite Today, my oven door fell off when I was trying to take out the bacon I was cooking. Why? Nobody hates bacon. FML I agree, your life sucks 552 You deserved it 101 2 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Alyxandrea Loffer - 26/7/2020 14:00 Oh, hai! Today, while answering hospice calls, I had to take this one with a straight face. FML I agree, your life sucks 690 You deserved it 114 0 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Alyxandrea Loffer - 9/7/2020 17:02 Green fingers Today, I learned that the $30 plant that I've been tediously tending to and extremely proud of for thriving is actually just a subspecies of ragweed. FML I agree, your life sucks 1031 You deserved it 424 3 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 23/5/2020 23:00 Crossed wires Today, there's no recovering from this. FML I agree, your life sucks 551 You deserved it 287 1 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous That sinking feeling… Today, I went to change the toilet paper roll. I failed. It was the last roll of the "right kind," and my wife is "fine" and "not mad." Let the confinement continue. FML I agree, your life sucks 1362 You deserved it 388 6 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By marina1686 If the shoe fits… Today, I worked a 9-hour retail like this. I didn't notice until 3 hours into my shift and had to deal with this embarrassment for the next 6 hours. FML I agree, your life sucks 680 You deserved it 950 15 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By FMLMaximus Warranties don't cover kids, do they? Today, my two year-old fell with a toy in her hand. The TV isn't even paid off yet. FML I agree, your life sucks 1173 You deserved it 440 8 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Sonia Kirpalani Today, I was drunk at a festival. I finally found the chippy, only to spend 7 quid on chips and curry sauce that my deck chair was never going to let me eat. FML I agree, your life sucks 528 You deserved it 875 6 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By FML FML in a nutshell. I agree, your life sucks 784 You deserved it 103 1 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By FML FML Users Rise Up! I agree, your life sucks 842 You deserved it 104 0 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By FML We've lost track of the plot of the show. I agree, your life sucks 590 You deserved it 100 1 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By FML So, how's your summer so far? I agree, your life sucks 656 You deserved it 97 3 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By FML Summer's here, and the time is right for… I agree, your life sucks 805 You deserved it 140 0 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By FML Mondays are like… I agree, your life sucks 999 You deserved it 99 2 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Nav Today, I sent a sexy text to my husband while he waited for a flight home at the airport. This was his response. FML I agree, your life sucks 1318 You deserved it 740 17 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Ash Today, the key broke inside my lock and I ended up needing bolt cutters. Cool. FML I agree, your life sucks 1080 You deserved it 118 2 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous Today, after I finally got the money for a pool, I built a deck, filled it a quarter of the way, then all the 4x4 beams collapsed. The pool ripped in half, flooding the yard. FML I agree, your life sucks 1242 You deserved it 843 11 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous Today, I told my toddler to put the cat down, so he did. On my leg. I guess I should have been more specific. FML I agree, your life sucks 1325 You deserved it 264 4 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By deerling Today, while shaving I accidentally shaved of half of my left nipple. Worst of all? I didn't notice it until I looked down and saw blood everywhere. That's when the pain hit. FML I agree, your life sucks 1919 You deserved it 456 14 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By CoffeeMate Today, my infant son refused to let me put him down for two minutes while I ate breakfast this morning. I was in a hurry to get to an event as it was, so I held him as I ate in the kitchen. While I did so, he, like a demonic feline, decided to smack my full cup of coffee over. FML. I agree, your life sucks 1579 You deserved it 444 14 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous Today, at work, I received flowers from a Tinder fling gone wrong. He constantly flipped out on me and then would apologize. I finally got tired of it and blocked him on all social media. The scary part is that I never told him where I work. FML I agree, your life sucks 2863 You deserved it 230 12 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Why Me Today, I borrowed my friend's truck to move. After unloading everything, I worked up a killer appetite and went to a drive thru. I found some Germ X in the truck, so I could eat on the way home... or so I thought. It turned out to be anal lube. I covered my hands in it. FML I agree, your life sucks 1835 You deserved it 643 3 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By LennyFace134 - Canada - Burlington Today, my "friend" returned my Survival Edition of Fallout 3. I should be happy, but he scratched it all to hell. My dad paid nearly $500 for it. He refuses to pay for it to be fixed or buy me a new one. FML I agree, your life sucks 2278 You deserved it 755 22 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By tristaph Today, a bird took a dump on my truck as I was driving and the wind pushed it into the keyhole. FML I agree, your life sucks 2326 You deserved it 174 6 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By jeauxann Today, my landlord refused to send a plumber over to unclog the sink. Now he wants me to pay for water damages because he didn't call a plumber sooner. FML I agree, your life sucks 3531 You deserved it 274 7 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Amber Rutledge Today, my 2-year-old learned how to open the fridge lock. I came out of the bathroom to what she called a "scrambled egg breakfast". FML I agree, your life sucks 2794 You deserved it 421 4 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Alan FML's Christmas Bingo! Cross off each subject as it is mentioned during your Christmas with family and/or friends! I agree, your life sucks 1162 You deserved it 220 5 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By FML Approved - United States - New York I agree, your life sucks 1621 You deserved it 228 1 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
Today, I ruined a 5 year no self harm run after me and my mother got into an argument. I’m 24 and still hate her for calling me disgusting and disgraceful... I agree, your life sucks 16 You deserved it 1 0 Comments
Today a judge in my country decided that it’s okay to force people to get a COVID-test, even if they’re not sick. Meanwhile, another judge decided that... I agree, your life sucks 22 You deserved it 4 0 Comments
Today, I'm in a relationship in which the sex was great and constant at the beginning. Now it’s so quick, bad and inconsistent, it’s like going at it with... I agree, your life sucks 384 You deserved it 63 1 Comments
Today, my husband’s been dropping hints he wants to open our marriage. When I got home, a couple of his coworkers dropped by "for drinks". They tried to... I agree, your life sucks 761 You deserved it 59 7 Comments
