Today, I crawled into bed at 2 in the morning. At 6 am, the telephone rang, waking me up. It was a wrong number. FML

by Tom / 11/07/2008 at 7:47am / United Kingdom (Oxfordshire) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out my "best friends" have gone on a crazy weekend and they didn't invite me. FML

by z / 11/07/2008 at 2:14am / Greece (Attiki) / Miscellaneous

Today, I'm on holiday, but my alarm clock isn't. It rang at 6 o'clock. FML

by Fsd / 11/05/2008 at 2:35am / France (Franche-Comte) / Miscellaneous

Today, I farted A LOT during my exam, all silent so I figured I should be OK. Then I looked around and everybody was suffocating and giving me sly looks. I am now known to everyone in the department as SuperFart. FML

by Hth / 10/27/2008 at 8:13pm / United States (Delaware) / Miscellaneous

Today, I am supposed to be doing my homework. Instead, I'm wasting my time on here. Yeah, it's kinda my fault. FML

by me / 10/27/2008 at 10:53am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, in the early hours of the morning, a worker started drilling the road right in front of my window. He stopped 5 minutes before my alarm clock rang. FML

by Noalixah / 10/26/2008 at 10:22pm / Finland (Southern Finland) / Miscellaneous

Today, my refrigerator defrosted itself. FML

by Anonymous / 10/25/2008 at 12:55pm / Miscellaneous

Today, my 63-year-old neighbor jumped out of his window. I was the first to find him, alive, naked and stuck in a bush. I guess I shouldn't have laughed at him while waiting for the ambulance, because he was my landlord. FML

Today, I got up at 8am and didn't take a shower so I could hear the postman at the door. He never came. I stink. FML

by Anonymous / 10/13/2008 at 4:24am / Australia / Miscellaneous

Today, I thought it was yesterday, I went to school for nothing. FML

Today, I woke up and switched on the TV. The first thing I saw was a picture of a wanted rapist, who looks just like me. I'm afraid to leave home. FML

by mehdi / 10/13/2008 at 4:20am / Miscellaneous