Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, I picked my car up from the shop. After 5 minutes I noticed the oil and check engine light on. I pulled over, then the engine shut off completely. Turns out they forgot to put oil back in my car. I'll be needing a new engine. FML

#5599183
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36727) - you deserved it (2622)

On 10/02/2009 at 1:51am - misc - by cartrouble (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I sat to the right of a girl I really like. I passed her a note asking her to homecoming. She read it, then hurriedly passed it to a hideous girl sitting on her left, who said yes, then hugged me. FML

#5598991
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36880) - you deserved it (11227)

On 10/02/2009 at 1:34am - misc - by asshole (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I applied for college graduation. Turns out my advisor screwed me over and now I'm 1 credit hour short of getting my degree. Now I have to wait another semester and pay $3,500 just to take a one hour class on Bowling so that I can graduate. FML

#5598199
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40137) - you deserved it (5869)

On 10/02/2009 at 12:46am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, while I was at work, my wife discovered you cannot put out a grease fire with water. I came home to a frantic spouse, a fire department bill, and a newly destroyed kitchen. FML

#5594172
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27247) - you deserved it (2175)

On 10/01/2009 at 9:43pm - misc - by needs_another_loan (man) - United States (Wyoming)

Today, while cleaning up, I dropped a box of thumbtacks, spilling them all over the floor. As I fumbled to pick them up, the power went out. FML

#5589145
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46821) - you deserved it (3502)

On 10/01/2009 at 6:31pm - misc - by Ouchies (woman) - United States (Florida) - moderated by Kevin Nealon

Today, I found out that if you don't clean the inside of your sonicare toothbrush, it can grow masses of fungus. I've been brushing my teeth with a vibrating mushroom for the past 5 months. FML

#5588493
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30233) - you deserved it (21167)

On 10/01/2009 at 5:57pm - misc - by mushroommouth (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my girlfriend told me she lost her phone and not to call or text her. After about three hours, I text her phone, asking if she found it yet. I got a reply, saying "Nope." FML

#5586348
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40828) - you deserved it (5204)

On 10/01/2009 at 4:07pm - misc - by dumbass (man) - United States (Pennsylvania) - moderated by Kevin Nealon

Today, I lent my parents a copy of "The Dark Knight", saying it was one of my favorite movies so they needed to watch it. A bit later my mom called... Apparently my roommate wanted to watch it as well, but couldn't find the case to his porno and decided to just use the Batman case instead. FML

#5585947
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38013) - you deserved it (5274)

On 10/01/2009 at 3:46pm - misc - by Broly171 (man) - United States (Iowa) - moderated by Kevin Nealon

Today, I was at my son's baseball game when a foul ball came flying toward my brand new car. In an attempt to save my windshield, I dove onto trying to stop the ball only to land on my windshield, crack it and see the ball land safely on the ground next to my car. FML

#5584861
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10182) - you deserved it (37629)

On 10/01/2009 at 2:27pm - misc - by baseball25635 (man) - United States (New York)

Today, it was my wedding day. Everything went great, except that no one showed up. Apparently, the address of the invitation was typed wrong. FML

#5581956
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35905) - you deserved it (15276)

On 10/01/2009 at 9:28am - misc - by notmarriedyet (woman) - United States (Georgia) - moderated by Kevin Nealon

Today, on facebook, I realized I had over 500 friends. I told my one friend and she changed her status to "How can Dan have over 500 facebook friends? Nobody even likes him" there were 42 likes, and twenty comments that said "agreed." FML

#5581051
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38589) - you deserved it (11658)

On 10/01/2009 at 6:33am - misc - by notliked (man) - United States (Georgia) - moderated by Kevin Nealon

Today, my friends and I noticed that people, no matter what stereotype, pretty much all have the same type of friends: the mean one, the funny one, etc... and started naming off the people in our group who fit into those personallities. We got to the token fat one, everyone looked at me and stopped talking. FML

#5580795
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34177) - you deserved it (9616)

On 10/01/2009 at 5:42am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I realized how much I'm on the computer. I tried to "CTRL+Z" on something I wrote down on my paper. FML

#5580319
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9105) - you deserved it (37409)

On 10/01/2009 at 3:56am - misc - by slcbabii23 (woman) - United States (Missouri) - moderated by Kevin Nealon



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