Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, I walked past a building site near my house, there was a sign saying "WARNING - Beware of the scaffolding". I started laughing at the stupidity of the sign, and walked straight into a metal pole. FML

#2963436
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6241) - you deserved it (51090)

On 06/17/2009 at 9:40am - misc - by jonnyc - United Kingdom (Hertford)

Today, I decided I had gathered enough solid evidence to justify dumping my cheating girlfriend. When I turned up, she broke up with me before I had a chance to confront her. Why? Apparently I have trust issues. FML

#2963101
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33292) - you deserved it (7524)

On 06/17/2009 at 9:03am - misc - by Anonymous - New Zealand (Waikato)

Today, my wife took herself, the kids, and extended family members I've never even heard of to New York. She paid the 7,000$ bill with my credit card. FML

#2959965
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36857) - you deserved it (3198)

On 06/17/2009 at 2:00am - misc - by rileym797 - United States (Florida)

Today, a real estate agent showed my house to some buyers. I found out when I exited the shower, fully nude, to them in the hallway. FML

#2959726
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37705) - you deserved it (4501)

On 06/17/2009 at 1:15am - misc - by visn (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was reading a book lying in my bed. I looked outside my window not to see the beautiful weather, but to see my creepy 70 year old neighbor staring at me with giant binaculars, then winks at me. I babysit his grandchildren this weekend, at his house. FML

#2959400
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33628) - you deserved it (1493)

On 06/17/2009 at 12:56am - misc - by Siehidbkdnd (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I had a coffee date. The guy was waiting with coffee to meet me on the patio. I walked up to him, caught my favorite pendant necklace on the table, broke the necklace trying to get it free, and rattled the table so intensely that the guy's coffee spilled all over him. FML

#2959523
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29964) - you deserved it (6274)

On 06/17/2009 at 12:52am - misc - by vintage_vogue (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was flying home to Milwaukee after a weekend in South Carolina. When I got to the airport, my reservation didn't match up with any flights. Turns out Expedia booked me on a flight that doen't exist. I spent ten hours waiting in the airport for a two hour flight. FML

#2958799
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34859) - you deserved it (2510)

On 06/17/2009 at 12:02am - misc - by lojo (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, while on my daily jog, I passed a very attractive girl. While passing her, she yelled "hey cutie". Trying to look cool, I tried turning around without stopping. I then fell off the curb and severely sprained my ankle. She caught up to help but was laughing the entire time. FML

#2949089
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9827) - you deserved it (31756)

On 06/16/2009 at 6:58pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New Mexico)

Today, it was my high school graduation. Because our school colors were red, black and white, and our principal looked somewhat like Hitler, the senior class prank was to salute him when he finished his speech. I was the only one. FML

#2938815
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39931) - you deserved it (25194)

On 06/16/2009 at 12:07pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, it was my 18th birthday. I got one thing: a fancy electric toothbrush from my little sister. I would say I'm happy to have something rather than nothing, except, for as long as the toothbrush works, there will be a Hannah Montana concert going on in my mouth. FML

#2935606
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45111) - you deserved it (3396)

On 06/16/2009 at 7:14am - misc - by BirthdayTeeth - United Arab Emirates (Dubai)

Today, I facebooked my friends about my upcoming birthday party, and told them to keep the date free. I got several responses telling me that's not possible, because that's the day the new Harry Potter movie comes out. FML

#2935549
414 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37593) - you deserved it (26382)

On 06/16/2009 at 7:10am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my daughter finally walked down the aisle with a man she loves very much. While I was escorting her, I managed to trip and fall down revealing what I've been trying to hide all of this time: my shiny gleaming bald head that showed when my wig fell off. FML

#2935439
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43596) - you deserved it (10714)

On 06/16/2009 at 6:49am - misc - by Unlucky (man) - Saudi Arabia (Ar Riyad)



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