Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Today, my elderly dad learned how to use Facebook. He now spends most of his time messaging me about his meals, his bowel movements and his foot fungus. He's now learning how to use Skype. FML

#21456611
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21498) - you deserved it (2057)

On 08/16/2015 at 4:14am - misc - by IceWrath - United Kingdom (York)

Today, I tried to vacuum to surprise my mom with a clean house. The vacuum started shorting out, sparked, and then burst into flames mid living room. FML

#21456542
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24136) - you deserved it (1863)

On 08/16/2015 at 12:10am - misc - by fire starter - United States (California)

Today, my mother gave me hell for my "video game addiction". The "game" in question? A professional flight simulator program that I'm using to complement my flight school lessons. FML

Today, I went to the mall and was persistently asked to try one of the curling irons at a kiosk. I don't like to use heat on my hair, but I reluctantly agreed. The iron burned off a good chunk of hair from the back of my head. FML

Today, I got in trouble for punching my sister. Apparently, it still counts if it's in Minecraft and she looked like she was going to steal my stuff. FML

#21456039
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21921) - you deserved it (2444)

On 08/14/2015 at 3:31pm - misc - by RobotUnicorn1209 - Canada (Ontario)

Today, a cute guy approached me at a nightclub. I was really excited, until he drunkenly slurred "Babe, I'd suck the farts from your asshole!" and then threw up everywhere. FML

#21455978
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23138) - you deserved it (1940)

On 08/14/2015 at 12:50pm - misc - by Brooke (woman) - United States (California)

Today, at my grandmother's funeral, my senile grandfather kept asking me "Where's granny? I've been looking for her, but I can't find her." FML

#21455960
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30862) - you deserved it (1370)

On 08/14/2015 at 11:08am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Denmark

Today, my car went missing. My sister constantly asks to borrow it, so I called her and asked if she had it. She swore blind that she didn't, so I called the cops and reported it stolen. They soon caught her driving the stolen vehicle. She blames me and is now telling everyone I set her up to be arrested. FML

#21455905
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28046) - you deserved it (1522)

On 08/14/2015 at 6:57am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Ukraine (Donets'ka Oblast')

Today, my friend and I were getting picked up by his dad after a carnival. As I put my stuff in the back of the car and shut the door to walk around to get in the other side, his dad drove off, thinking I was in the car, leaving me to walk up their hill. It was midnight and I ended up lost. FML

#21455882
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23089) - you deserved it (1959)

On 08/14/2015 at 5:08am - misc - by jonloran - United States (Nevada)

Today, I was unloading Cokes outside of the movie theater I work at. While bent over, I heard someone call out, "Damn girl, you got a fat ass," followed by, "Oh God, that's a man!" I am indeed a man. FML

#21455147
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27492) - you deserved it (2399)

On 08/12/2015 at 9:50am - misc - by Why Me - United States (Washington)

Today, my mom got angry that I wasn't responding to her texts. I couldn't because I was in the dentist's chair. She'd dropped me off, and after returning from errands, sent the text from the waiting room. FML

#21455023
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21605) - you deserved it (1414)

On 08/12/2015 at 12:05am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I got all excited because I thought my crush was flirting with me, when in actuality she was taking advantage of me liking her so she and her friends could make fun of my speech impediment. FML

#21454921
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32456) - you deserved it (1691)

On 08/11/2015 at 8:00pm - misc - by SY5623 - United Kingdom (Edinburgh, City of)

Today, at Subway, the pretty girl serving made me so nervous by that I forgot what cucumbers were called. FML

#21454765
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19566) - you deserved it (3114)

On 08/11/2015 at 12:22pm - misc - by it's awkward - United States (California)



FML's blog

  • Pauline's illustrated FML
  • Come on, no need to make that face ! Yep, it's sadly the last, mournful days of Summer. People are packing up their beach balls and flip flops, putting their caravans back into storage and trying to forget…

Friday 28 August 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: