Today, my mother-in-law scheduled her neck surgery for the same day our baby is being born. She also fully expects my husband to drive her to the hospital and stay for her recovery. Uh, yeah no. FML

by merchgirl / 11/14/2016 at 5:31am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, my mom volunteered me to house-sit for one of her friends. This lady has texted me over ten times in less than 24 hours, called me unreasonable for not dropping jury duty to meet with her, and has messaged my mom multiple times to complain about me. My mom already said I would do this for free. FML

by Knittedbirch / 11/13/2016 at 9:36pm / Miscellaneous

Today, my cousin invited me to an event that would be on Saturday night. The first thing I did after she texted me, was ask my mom if I could go. I'm 20. FML

Today, I replaced my dating apps with food apps cause at least someone will show up after I use the food apps. FML

by fyreangel / 11/10/2016 at 4:39pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, while going to the mall, I witnessed the horror of someone sneezing and shitting themselves at the same time. FML

by I have Flashbacks Now / 11/10/2016 at 4:15pm / United States (Rhode Island) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was subpoenaed on behalf of my mother-in-law. My husband said if I didn't defend her and consequently lie under oath, our marriage is over. She said, "I can get rid of two problems in one day!" FML

by anonymous / 11/10/2016 at 9:29am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, I showed my grandma my new septum piercing. Her only response was, "I hope it gets infected and your nose falls off." FML

Today, I mockingly made "President Trump" jokes all day to my friends, knowing Clinton was bound to win the election. FML

by toametru1 / 11/09/2016 at 2:08am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, my country elected a man who thinks global warming is a hoax. FML

by mycountryisdumb / 11/09/2016 at 1:54am / United States (Alaska) / Miscellaneous

Today, it's my birthday. The only time people have contacted me is to ask who I voted for. FML

by birthday blues / 11/08/2016 at 2:15pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to the store to buy new blankets and a comforter. A cute guy started chatting with me and asked about the new bedroom decor. I lied and said I just had a major break up and needed new things, instead of admitting I was too lazy to dig out and wash my winter blankets from last year. FML

by Anonymous / 11/07/2016 at 3:13pm / Miscellaneous

Today, my step-mom tried to ground me. I met her just yesterday, when she moved in. FML

by invasive species / 11/07/2016 at 10:08am / Miscellaneous

Today, I helped my hoarder grandfather clean out his garage. Not only did I step on a nail, I also slipped in a puddle of used oil that's been sitting out for two years, and broke my nose. He didn't pay me since I wasn't able to finish the job. FML

by megamonster99 / 11/07/2016 at 10:06am / United States (Maryland) / Miscellaneous