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Today, my dad drove me to the airport. As I got out of the car, he said, "You better pop that zit on your face, security might think it's a bomb". FML

#21406694
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30592) - you deserved it (2792)

On 05/08/2015 at 9:44am - misc - by brittrus - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my obsessive-compulsive mother barred me from using the toilet she had just cleaned. She told me to wait until tomorrow. FML

#21406668
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27513) - you deserved it (1815)

On 05/08/2015 at 8:46am - misc - by MedChew (man) - Malaysia (Kuala Lumpur)

Today, I spent nearly two hours listening to our cleaning lady talking about her son's infected penis, her fear of dentists, how to catch and kill ducks, her husband's childhood and her supposedly murdered dog. She ended up crying and left without cleaning. FML

#21406339
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27799) - you deserved it (2966)

On 05/07/2015 at 5:56pm - misc - by Martine624 - Netherlands

Today, my girlfriend and I somehow got into the conversation of what the weirdest thing we have ever found in food was. She said she found paper in her fortune cookie; she was serious. FML

#21406274
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28613) - you deserved it (2501)

On 05/07/2015 at 3:52pm - misc - by Random737193 - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was out with my youngest cousin and we had to stop for gas. Since he just got his license, I asked if he wanted to pump the gas while I went into the station to get snacks and pay. He pumped my car full of diesel. FML

#21406178
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28493) - you deserved it (6272)

On 05/07/2015 at 11:45am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my grandmother came to visit and asked me, "Did you change your hair, or are you just fatter now?" FML

#21406084
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27210) - you deserved it (2567)

On 05/07/2015 at 7:01am - misc - by Chubby (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, while out shopping with friends, I was apphrehended by two bounty hunters because they recognized my purple-dyed hair. Too bad my name isn't Natalie, who apparently shares the same hair color. They didn't believe me, even after I showed my ID. FML

Today, my mom got mad at me because I wouldn't write to Ellen Degeneres about her. She now won't talk to me. FML

#21405568
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27689) - you deserved it (2800)

On 05/06/2015 at 9:36am - misc - by anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, I told my husband I felt unfulfilled and unhappy in my life. He suggested I do more chores. FML

#21405437
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27452) - you deserved it (3272)

On 05/06/2015 at 12:13am - misc - by msleea - United States (California)

Today, marks the fourth day in a row that I've worn the same outfit to prove to my parents that they pay me no attention. They still haven't noticed. FML

#21405167
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30169) - you deserved it (3314)

On 05/05/2015 at 3:54pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I decided it was time to start looking for my own place and finally gain my full independence. My mom agreed happily without hesitation, which was surprising, but not anywhere near as surprising as finding out I have one day to get my shit together and leave. FML

#21404939
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26493) - you deserved it (2785)

On 05/05/2015 at 2:42am - misc - by anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, I was talking to a cute guy at my house party and had to fart. Luckily, it was silent. Unluckily, he smelled it, thought my house had a gas leak, and ran to the basement to check the pipes and ensure our safety. FML

#21404933
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26452) - you deserved it (5505)

On 05/05/2015 at 1:41am - misc - by anonymous - United States (California)

Today, while riding the subway a homeless man got on asking for money. I went to give him a dollar but he refused because I was "of the Asian persuasion." FML

#21404625
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26680) - you deserved it (2072)

On 05/04/2015 at 5:02pm - misc - by Malíya - United States (New Jersey)



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