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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, my mother moved in to my 2-bedroom apartment with me. She brought her boyfriend, 4 chihuahuas, and 2 birds with her. FML

#21359436
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30269) - you deserved it (4427)

On 02/19/2015 at 8:46pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my extremely hot coworker told me that I smelled good. At a complete loss for words, I replied, "Oh, I'm sure I don't." FML

#21359386
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27458) - you deserved it (4813)

On 02/19/2015 at 7:14pm - misc - by thisiswhyimavirgin (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, whilst walking to a primary school to give pupils a lesson on cleanliness, I tripped and landed on a dog turd. FML

#21359149
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26462) - you deserved it (2747)

On 02/19/2015 at 11:06am - misc - by anonymous - United Kingdom (Leicester)

Today, I tried to stage an intervention for a friend who abuses drugs. I ended up with my hair on fire. FML

#21359096
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28844) - you deserved it (3643)

On 02/19/2015 at 8:34am - misc - by Anonymous -

Today, a photo of my friends and me was posted in our college group. I didn't notice my legs looked enormous until my friend pointed it out. Her comment got 50 likes. FML

#21358355
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28499) - you deserved it (2814)

On 02/17/2015 at 11:22pm - misc - by ImNotFat - New Zealand

Today, I told my cousin that I would gladly help him through the loss of my aunt. That is until he started flirting with me. FML

#21358332
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29331) - you deserved it (2271)

On 02/17/2015 at 11:02pm - misc - by whateven333 (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, a homeless guy told me I looked like shit and to have some self-respect. Right. FML

#21358017
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27254) - you deserved it (3940)

On 02/17/2015 at 1:23pm - misc - by trolls have hit the gutters (woman) - United Kingdom (Durham)

Today, a model I've been working on for an art competition was declined. They thought I was being insensitive and "rudely glorifying 9/11". My model was about the ending scene of King Kong. I spent twenty hours on that model. FML

#21357798
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (2) - you deserved it (2151)

On 02/17/2015 at 1:39am - misc - by Swatted - United States (Nevada)

Today, I accidentally crashed my mom's car into my dad's car. FML

#21357430
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32448) - you deserved it (12916)

On 02/16/2015 at 3:43pm - misc - by cactii - United States

Today, a police car hit my parked vehicle, likely due to icy road conditions. When the officer came over to talk to me, I assumed it was to give me his insurance information. Nope. It was to give me a ticket for 'impeding a police officer'. My car was in my driveway. FML

#21357102
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40714) - you deserved it (2143)

On 02/16/2015 at 1:01am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I threw up on a police officer who was trying to do a random breath test. I wasn't drunk or hungover. I'm pregnant and suffering morning sickness. FML

#21356993
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33795) - you deserved it (2250)

On 02/15/2015 at 10:25pm - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my roommate let out a blood-curdling scream in the bathroom. I ran in to see what was going on, only to find her sitting on the toilet, topless. Turned out she'd tried to pierce her own tit using a clothespin and a needle. FML

#21356659
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33635) - you deserved it (2805)

On 02/15/2015 at 12:57pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Denmark

Today, my girlfriend confessed to cheating on me. Unfortunately, she's a pathological liar and I can't be sure if it's really true, along with half the stuff she tells me on a daily basis. Love is hard. FML

#21356609
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29585) - you deserved it (9887)

On 02/15/2015 at 11:02am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Oregon)



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