Miscellaneous: Today, I found a stick of butter. Under my couch. FML

This is a Nearly FML. It’s an FML, nearly. It got positive votes from the users, by wasn’t approved by our team.

By summerstar042 - 21/06/2016 23:00 - United States - Buffalo

Today, I found a stick of butter. Under my couch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 222

You deserved it 32

Labour Day: Rest or Disaster?
Find out how a day off can turn into a series of hilarious, unexpected events. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Top comments

Boometh 15

Wednesday 22 June 2016 10:47

Hopefully you can find some popcorn under there, too.

nonsense_ok 11

Wednesday 22 June 2016 23:59

The butter was UNDER the couch. Sitting down doesn't effect it, unless the couch breaks under OPs ass. Then that'd be a whole different FML

Comments

sillymama 21

Wednesday 22 June 2016 10:04

I hope you saw it before you sat down.

nonsense_ok 11

Wednesday 22 June 2016 23:59

The butter was UNDER the couch. Sitting down doesn't effect it, unless the couch breaks under OPs ass. Then that'd be a whole different FML

Boometh 15

Wednesday 22 June 2016 10:47

Hopefully you can find some popcorn under there, too.

schindler12345 24

Friday 24 June 2016 0:38

Are your relatives the people from here comes honey boo boo?

Keywords

Music Names Kids Customers Work Awkward Bodyshaming Coworkers Money Roommate Landlords Dogs Parents Allergies AITA Embarrassing Cute Neighbours Singing Accident Health Ironic Animals Cats Love Airport Cheating Sex Intimacy Relationship advice

The Top

Today, my dad, who never supported us growing up, and who calls once a month to collect his monthly living expenses, gave me an ultimatum: either buy him a plane ticket so that he can come live with me forever (he's a raging alcoholic) OR to send him $4,500 US Dollars (which where he lives is someone's 6 month salary). FML

I agree, your life sucks 413

You deserved it 84

Today, my boyfriend came over. We'd planned on losing out virginities today. What we didn't plan on was having my 9-year-old brother and his friends making a video of "What teens do when no one is home." They taped the whole thing, including the five minutes it took us to get the condom on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 964

You deserved it 931

The Top

Today, I couldn't open my car door from the inside. I rang my father-in-law in a panic and he opened it from the outside for me. Then he asked why I just didn't roll down the window and do it myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 673

You deserved it 1 698

Today, my daughter came home in tears, completely distraught. It took half an hour to convince her to tell me what was wrong. What horrific thing happened to her? One of her friends wore the same outfit as her to the movies, and apparently that's a betrayal of their friendship. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 913

You deserved it 4 068

Today, I had a blind date with a really cute guy. Just when I was about to invite him back to my place for a nightcap, he took out a catalog of Russian mail-order brides and asked for my help in picking out the best one. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 004

You deserved it 3 448

Today, my boyfriend was cooking me dinner. He walked away and I decided to help by giving the pan of veggies a sautee flip. My boyfriend failed to mention that he had just pulled that pan out of a 500 degree oven. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 108

You deserved it 64 106

Today, the kids in my 6 year-old daughter’s class were asked what they feared the most. My daughter’s worst fear is apparently not werewolves, sharks, monsters or clowns. Nope, it’s "Eating food I don’t like." FML

I agree, your life sucks 717

You deserved it 206

Today, I went out to a club, hoping to score. I'd read about a trick pickup artists use called "negging" and decided to try it out. As I finished complimenting a girl for being brave enough to have not made much of an effort with her makeup, she slammed her knee between my legs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 895

You deserved it 53 459