Risky comeback

By Anon - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - Singapore - Singapore

Today, my mum asked me, "Shouldn't you be cleaning your room?" On impulse, I replied, "Shouldn't you be in the kitchen?" I've never been hit so hard in my life. FML
I agree, your life sucks 36 413
You deserved it 127 544

Top comments

You must say it so often for it to become a reflex huh?

Yeah...I can't see how you didn't deserve that. YDI, indeed!

Comments

XDsmileyDX_fml 24

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oj101 33

Don't forget the bruises, plasters and chipped teeth for added effect!

Damn, should've said this to my mum while I lived with her.

Damian95 16

If he tells you to bring a sandwich, the best come back is to COME BACK with a damn sandwich!

Redoxx_fml 22

And that 133 is how you get smacked

xXHollowIchigoXx 17

That #133, is why you don't have a girlfriend. And if you have a girlfriend, well then... That is why I don't have a girlfriend.

Damian95 16

Well you are right I do not. But I don't want one right now. And as long as I don't say that out loud I can get one anytime. It's a joke I can use...for now. Didn't mean to offend anyone lol.

therealafroninga 10

*Insert insane feminist crap* yeah yeah yeah, women are equal, but god forbid they ever have to put the toilet seat down.

Redoxx_fml 22

what exactly did you mean by saying " never been hit so hard in my life"

OP means he got ******* SMASHED by his mum!

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twaumat 28

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*smacks the shit out of kid* "oh wait honey, I'm so sorry, you're right. let me go into the kitchen for you." does that make any sense?

onealmxwilson 18

No, 2, she hit him harder than he's ever been hit before in his life. Can't you read?

Yea. It was called 'don't you dare talk to me that way' on 'you're grounded' with ' I never raised you to be so rude and sexist' with lettuce, tomato, and extra cheese. >:|

why the hell would you ask someone if they can read.... in words.

lilkeykey14 5

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oj101 33

I agree. It's disrespectful to talk to any female like that, but saying that to your mom just takes it to a whole new level.

I wonder if he's ever said that to his girlfr- oooh nevermind....

It's disrespectful to talk to any person like that*

HeyHeyFishFillet 34

Feminists are stupid. "Yeah equality!" "But were still soft and fragile on the inside and you have to be nicer to us and treat us better" I'm a southern gentleman but I'm sorry I see flawed logic here.

NagainaFier 16

Especially the chef! Never piss off the person who prepares your food o.o Ever.

mvc3ftw 17

What if you prepare your own food? o.O Could you piss yourself off and give yourself an extra "side dish"? and get angry with yourself for screwing with your own food which leads to a funny scenario where you kick your own ass? just a thought

lmngrl889 14

a big YDI!!!!!! and I don't say that often. you know what they call guys who make kitchen jokes??? SINGLE. YDI. Get some respect!

You must say it so often for it to become a reflex huh?

crazytwinsmom 25

Reflex and impulse are two different things.

It was Instinct at first. Guess OP changed it.

Goober244 12

Reminds me of the time where my cousin asked me what I was doing and without thinking I said "Your mom"

Yeah...I can't see how you didn't deserve that. YDI, indeed!

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Curious is the sarcasm not obvious enough?

It's obvious enough, however it's too expected and not so fun anymore as most people have seen it before. So, most people that get it didn't like it and the ones that didn't get it certainly didn't like it.

rg350dx 29

Because hitting your kids is always the answer! Yayyy violence!

There's a difference between abuse and discipline. One hard whack is discipline. If she broken op's jaw it'd have been abuse.

rg350dx 29

There's also a difference between discipline and assault. Discipline doesn't entail physically hitting someone. There are many other forms of discipline. If this happened between random people on the street someone would be taken away in a cruiser. Because assault is illegal.

I've always wanted a t shirt with a silhouette of a belt above a baseball bat with small line of text between reading "there's a fine line between discipline and abuse"

I'll bet OP won't use that line again, though.

67, if someone offends you, what are you supposed to do? Sit down and half a talk with them? What if they're your child? Obviously they need correction, and children are little ***** and don't listen. Sometimes, the problem needs to be corrected on the spot. If you don't correct your child, you're a horrible parent. It shouldn't be left to everybody else to do what you should've done when they end up pulling the same shit.

JessiKitty_lol 7

I agree with 67 and 79. If your kids are "little ***** in need of correction" in the form of spanking, then it's obvious that you did something wrong somewhere along the line. You can't teach your kid that violence is wrong when you're hitting them. To add to my point, spanking IS hitting no matter how you try to justify it. People in favor of spanking describe it as a "swift swat to the bottom" but come on, "swat" is just another synonym for "hit."

rg350dx 29

83, no if someone offends you you're supposed to pull out a pair of dueling pistols walk twenty paces, turn, then fire. Yeah you should talk to someone if they offended you. Or better yet just don't let someone offend you and be an adult. If they're going to be that petty let them be. Ignore it.

I'm sorry, but you're an idiot. Spanking your kid is fine. Grabbing your kid and smacking then across the face or beating them with something is wrong. No kid was permanently hurt, mentally or physically, by getting spanked when they did something wrong. It's people like you that cause all these kids walking around acting like disrespectful assholes.

JessiKitty_lol 7

109: Do explain the difference between smacking someone on the butt versus the face. Smacking is smacking no matter it be the face, butt, legs, stomach, etc. Also, if your child spanked another child because the other child stole their toy without asking, would you consider that acceptable?

We had a policy in our house when my daughter was young; if she neglected to put her brain in gear before putting her mouth in motion, I would just look at her, giving her the opportunity for a do-over, which she always took. She was taught manners at an early age, but even the most well behaved child will slip. As a parent, I'm thinking OP got "cute" once too often. Mom's method might not be the most politically correct, but I'll bet OP thinks twice next time.

Emily062611 6

I don't disagree with spanking - I was spanked and I turned out perfectly fine. It's difficult (not impossible, but difficult) to find an effective alternative to spanking. This wasn't "discipline", anyway - this was her knee-jerk reaction to his "impulse".

This is why many kids are screwed up today. When a child does something extremely disrespectful and wrong, parents will just yell at them and give them a little slap on the wrist(figuratively). Sometimes spanking or a belt will show the child that the parents mean business, there's absolutely nothing wrong with it

fylx100 19

44, so a woman getting hit by her husband because she did something he didn't like is just discipline? So then the husband could tell the Judge that and they would let it go and he should have no charges pressed against him by your logic. After all, he is just disciplining her. Yeah, in the real word, the husband would have charges against him and could possibly go to jail and/or have fines since they consider that spousal abuse.

all these people shouting child abuse can shut it. if it was his girlfriend or wife that he said it to you people wouldn't be anywhere near as whiney. just select YDI call him an idiot and go about your day.

#69, send it in as an idea for a t-shirt to T-shirt hell. If they pick it as a design to use, you get a free shirt. Just sayin'! Good luck!

xXHollowIchigoXx 17

All this rage about DISCIPLINE and ABUSE. OMFG! It gets me so ANGRY. PEOPLE, FOR ONE MOMENT LETS MAKE PRETEND WE ALL HAVE AN ACTUAL BRAIN HERE. LET'S ALL TAKE A REAL LONG THOUGHT ON WHAT "DISCIPLINE" AND "ABUSE" MEANS. NO, FOR ***** SAKE, IF A HUSBAND BEATS HIS WIFE BECAUSE SHE DIDN'T MAKE HIM A SANDWHICH IT IS NOT DISCIPLINE. DISCIPLINE, ARGUABLY, IS A FORM OF PARENTING!!!!!(god PLEASE notice the extra exclamation points) BEATING SOMEONE TO DEATH OVER SOMETHING SO MEDIOCRE IS NOT, WILL NOT, CAN NOT, AND SHOULD NOT BE TAKEN AS DISCIPLINE. IT IS DOWNRIGHT ABUSE. A 5 YEAR OLD WOULD SAY THAT. HOWEVER, IF A CHILD (like OP hear. Maybe in his teens) SAYS SOMETHING DISRESPECTFUL OR PURPOSELY MISBEHAVES BECAUSE HE COULDNT HAVE HIS WAY, A "SPANKING" IS IN FAVOUR. Sorry for the all caps rage but idiocy gets me all fired up. Know what... I'm gonna go beat my cat for no apparent reason. Blame my abusive father and call it discipline. (and if you're actually stupid enough not to see the sarcasm in that, PLEASE do not say anything about how you know the difference between "discipline" and "abuse".) Your friendly neighborhood upcoming psychologist, Larry.

I was raised in a home where hitting, spanking, back handing, slapping etc were the accepted norms of punishment .. it was a PUNISHMENT not a teaching of a better way. I swore when I had children I would never lay my hands on them. I was blessed with 2 beautiful girls who I raised as a single parent and as hard and frustrating at it was at times, I kept to it and I never hit them. They got spoken to, explained what it was that had been done wrong and often they helped in the choice of an appropriate time out or loss of privilege for what had been done wrong. My girls are now both young adults, 22 and 19 .. the eldest has a full time job she loves and the youngest is in college. They aren't perfect, but they are proud, independent, hard-working, productive members of society and we are all very close. So, NO! You do NOT have to HIT A CHILD to teach them right from wrong. These are your children, you should show your children nothing but love and patience. Thumb me down all you want, it doesn't change the fact that using violence against someone you say you love, child or spouse, is wrong, it makes no sense at all. I love you - SMACK!

As a parent I am absolutely horrified by these comments. There is no need to hit a child. And no, 83, not all children are little ***** who need correcting. My 2 year old has impeccable behaviour and I've never hit her, and never will. She is my child, the person I love the most in the world, why on earth would I want to hit her?! It's called proper parenting and if you can't raise a child without hitting them then you ought not to have them at all.

I don't believe you should hit a kid but sometimes it's necessary. It wasn't in this situation, but one comment shouldn't have sparked such a debate. Everyone is entitled to their own opinion

Disciplining a child is much more different than domestic abuse. You're an idiot, case closed.

I'm not choosing sides here but all of this on assault I'll say one thing. A person under the age of 18 can't press any charges, and in which case it would be considered assault or aggravated battery because its between two legal adults. So the hypothetical situations in a courtroom because you smacked your child are false.

Gonna throw in my 2 cents here, cause frankly, and sadly, I've nothing better to do atm... Its certainly not necesary to you physical punishment to raise a child well. Does that make it wrong? Not at damn bit. Do I personally consider it an effective way? No. It's ineffective if unaccompanied by an explanation, but all kids, all people, are unique, and some may respond better to that than to other methods. And to 116: Seriously? The buttocks is mostly fat tissue, whereas the face is right in front of the brain.... you really think there's no difference there??

FreshPie, the difference between discipline and abuse comes down to motive. If its for the childs own good, its discipline. If its because the childs giving you a headache, its abuse. For instqnce, a kid who's too young to understand an explanation of why they shouldn't do something, say a 2 year old who refuses to stop trying to play with a light socket. A little pain now, to prevent the possibility of permanent pain. I wouldn't encourage physical punishment when communication can solve the problem, but different circumstances call for different responses.

But she's not a random person on the street. She's his Mother, and as a mother it's her job and primary responsibility to ensure he grows up to be a good human being. I guarantee he will think twice about being so god damn ignorant to another person for no reason. As far as I'm concerned she not only did her job, but also did him a favour.

Also, I should note that I don't believe in spanking as anywhere near the primary form of punishment, and hope that I never have to spank my children - haven't yet. However if my child ever said anything that ignorant I might have had the same reaction and there is no doubt in my mind that he learned just how wrong - and not funny - his comment was.

Emily062611 6

I'm sorry, FreshPie, but I think you're being hypocritical. You're giving us vague examples about people we've never met as essentially a case study against spanking. I am truly sorry that your father abused your mother - that's horrible! However, that's really not what we're talking about. Spanking, at least as I was raised, is generally two swats with a wooden spoon or a hand - between the ages of 2 and maybe 6. It's difficult to "use your words" with a two year old who is biting another child. My parents never spanked us simply because they were angry, and they always explained the reason we were being spanked, and how we could avoid it next time. They always gave us fair warning before spanking us. It's difficult to find statistical data on spanking, because it's generally a psychological study, and it's very difficult to mathematically quantify that type of data. This is a debate about personal preferences, and the best we are both able to do is present examples.

FreshPie, I don't know your grandfather, obvioisly, but it sounds like he beat your mother rather than a simple spanking, and that he did so because he wanted to, not to help her. As I said above, the latter alone would make it abuse. If you're looking for concrete, prove-all guidelines to whether a parent is being abusive or not, then you're just being naive. Especially considering abuse is not limited to physical acts.

julfunky 29

#187 - I just feel the need to tell you that your "love and patience" theory doesn't apply to every child. I used to believe that would work until I met kids that were being raised under that exact idea. These kids ended up starting fires in the house, tried flushing the cat down the toilet, and a long list of terrifying shenanigans. The best part is that they didn't even try to deny it because they didn't seem to understand their mistake. Do I believe in beating the shit out of your child? Not one bit. I believe yelling usually works quite well when needed, maybe a spanking or two if that fails. However, to say that love and patience is the only way is kind of ignorant. If it worked for your kids then you are lucky and blessed, but don't criticize the parents who have more eccentric children. Remember, what works for one child may not work for another.

Let me guess, she hit you with a big wooden spoon?

That's what my stepmom does to my stepsiblings. It works. now she just has to pull it out and they stop doing what they're doing. I've heard the sound of them being hit with the wooden spoon from across the house.

hit OP with big frying pan, maybe better

My mom tried that on me once...she hit me one time and it broke in half.

xelle_garfieldx 12

Being a smartass doesn't work for parents, OP

SHAMUS_the_WITTY 18
SHAMUS_the_WITTY 18

**20. My above comment was directed at 20.

46/48 It would have been an unnecessary fail whoever you directed it at. Certainly not 'witty' as your username claims.

Very uncalled for and unnecessary 46/48 ._.