zingline89

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Offline (the 02/13/2016 at 10:20pm)

zingline89

23Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Saturday 1 July 1989 (26 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 7577
  • Number of comments : 448
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About zingline89 : Real estate investor and salesman. If you think something I said was stupid, you most likely failed to sense the sarcasm. Either that or I just said something really stupid.

zingline89's page activity

Visits<b>dBLIZZARD</b> - the 04/16/2016 at 5:24pm<b>JohnTheDonJuan</b> - the 04/09/2016 at 8:56am<b>oyeh</b> - the 04/07/2016 at 7:19pm<b>Sayeret_Matkal</b> - the 04/07/2016 at 6:39pm<b>jet223</b> - the 04/07/2016 at 3:24pm<b>bjnono001</b> - the 03/01/2016 at 7:57pm<b>thefaekitten</b> - the 03/01/2016 at 11:45am<b>RaRitsujun</b> - the 02/26/2016 at 2:13pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 01/28/2016 at 11:01pm<b>Frozen_Flames</b> - the 01/15/2016 at 12:10pm<b>CreepinCow</b> - the 01/08/2016 at 4:26pm<b>riahlum</b> - the 12/23/2015 at 3:12pm<b>notminecraft</b> - the 12/22/2015 at 12:00am<b>redstone7693</b> - the 12/21/2015 at 1:47pm<b>MassiDelta</b> - the 12/03/2015 at 11:21pm<b>barisozdemir</b> - the 11/20/2015 at 10:24am<b>Lenora_Cain</b> - the 11/07/2015 at 8:58pm<b>Loyalteez</b> - the 11/05/2015 at 1:02pm

Fucked!<b>thefaekitten</b> - the 03/01/2016 at 5:45pm<b>barisozdemir</b> - the 11/20/2015 at 4:24pm<b>theBalloonPerson</b> - the 10/07/2015 at 5:05pm<b>ToxicTyrael</b> - the 09/17/2015 at 4:27pm<b>Mcstud1y</b> - the 08/18/2015 at 5:55am<b>Supaviper</b> - the 07/15/2015 at 4:46am<b>D_Word_Head</b> - the 07/11/2015 at 3:56am<b>cheesyfeet2001</b> - the 05/06/2015 at 1:28am<b>Chronomay</b> - the 05/05/2015 at 4:22pm<b>eck1220</b> - the 05/05/2015 at 12:00am<b>NozomiTojo</b> - the 05/01/2015 at 3:45pm<b>EvilTurtle</b> - the 04/22/2015 at 9:50pm<b>the_aspect</b> - the 04/16/2015 at 1:46pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 03/21/2015 at 12:27am<b>ZombieSazza</b> - the 03/08/2015 at 10:35pm<b>vikingchick</b> - the 02/17/2015 at 4:09pm<b>BlondePsycho</b> - the 02/17/2015 at 4:34am<b>PartyMoose</b> - the 02/14/2015 at 10:55am

zingline89's FML badges

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

See all of zingline89's badges

zingline89's favorite FMLs

Today, a girl I follow on Twitter tweeted, "Why can't I have a cute math tutor?" I'm her math tutor. FML

by Anonymous / 01/14/2013 at 9:28pm / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend gave me lingerie from Victoria's Secret. He then added that his mother picked it out. FML

by Anonymous / 01/14/2013 at 7:21pm / Canada (Newfoundland) / Miscellaneous

Today, my dad was helping me move my stuff out. I'd asked my boyfriend to deal with my sex toys and lingerie, but still my dad showed up later at my new place, handed me a box full of them all, and simply said, "I don't want to know." FML

by nean83 / 01/12/2013 at 12:11am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, one of my paintings was accepted into a local art gallery. It would've been a dream come true, had my "best friend" not submitted it under her own name and taken all the credit. FML

by Anonymous / 01/11/2013 at 2:47pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was asked out by a friend of mine. He's a doctor and works at a prestigious hospital, so thinking we would eat somewhere special, I got all dressed up. We ended up eating at his hospital's cafeteria, because he gets a small employee discount. FML

by wowthanks / 01/11/2013 at 2:37pm / United States (California) / Love

Today, I was running on the treadmill at my local gym when I saw a girl I like a lot. I called out to her to say hi. As she was coming over, I accidentally stepped on the belt with one foot, crashed down on the treadmill, and continued to slide down in front of her, emerging with a gashed knee and arm. FML

by Dkim620 / 01/06/2013 at 10:16pm / United States / Love

Today, my fiancé decided he wants a baby only because our dog is good, quiet, and falls asleep as soon as he starts to cradle her. He thinks a baby will be just like that. FML

by Twiggysucks68 / 01/06/2013 at 8:49pm / United States (Tennessee) / Animals

Today, I visited my grandparents' house. While getting a drink from the fridge, I noticed the Christmas card my family sent them had my face scratched out. When I confronted them about it, they said it was the cat. They don't have a cat. FML

by HatedGrandson / 01/06/2013 at 7:50pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I had to beg my husband not to shave his pubic hair into a handlebar moustache. FML

by marisa / 01/04/2013 at 7:31pm / Ireland (Carlow) / Love

Today, I got fired from my job because I "look too grumpy." FML

by Anonymous / 01/02/2013 at 2:28am / Canada (Alberta) / Work

Today, my boyfriend discovered that if he flicks my clitoris just right, my legs both twitch spastically regardless of arousal level. He thinks it's hilarious and can no longer take sex seriously. FML

by geewhy / 12/26/2012 at 4:20pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Intimacy

Today, due to bad weather, my dad let me take his car to drive to my apartment 3 hours away. I only realized when I got there that my keys were still sitting on my parents' kitchen counter. FML

by Anonymous / 12/22/2012 at 1:31am / Transportation

Today, I found out that the tinsel on my Christmas tree is worth a couple of hundred euros per strand. Well, that's how much the two that were surgically removed from my cat have cost me. At least the cat's going to be fine. FML

by I Like My Cat / 12/21/2012 at 5:02am / Netherlands (Utrecht) / Animals

Today, at my new job, some juvenile cockbite spiked my food with a laxative, as part of some kind of bizarre hazing ritual. The bastard got ratted out and suspended, but my arsehole now feels like it's been blown apart by a nuclear warhead. I thought this shit only happened in movies. FML

by Anonymous / 12/20/2012 at 4:49pm / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Work

Today, I was sleeping on an airplane. I dreamed that I was running my hands up and down my friend's leg sexually to creep him out. I woke up and I realized that I was running my hand up and down the leg of the old man sitting next to me. FML

by joyness / 12/20/2012 at 9:49am / Taiwan (T'ai-pei) / Transportation