zerstinick

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Offline (the 06/26/2015 at 1:03am)

zerstinick

2Fucked!

zerstinickzerstinick
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 6 March 1996 (20 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1398
  • Number of comments : 1
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About zerstinick : Here to kick back and enjoy the FMLs, message me if you like, I don't mind

zerstinick's page activity

Visits<b>bowmanwb</b> - the 10/27/2015 at 11:37pm<b>RAH94</b> - the 03/22/2015 at 3:51am<b>dakatabg</b> - the 03/17/2015 at 8:48pm<b>Marie54321</b> - the 01/03/2015 at 8:18am<b>devildog562</b> - the 11/12/2014 at 7:35pm<b>TopiaryOwl</b> - the 11/04/2014 at 1:08am<b>blushes1807</b> - the 10/18/2014 at 4:57pm<b>aleahlioness</b> - the 10/13/2014 at 2:08am<b>Connerm</b> - the 10/12/2014 at 4:44pm<b>juststephhere</b> - the 10/12/2014 at 1:58pm<b>Aero_x</b> - the 10/12/2014 at 1:38pm<b>brookenicolee29</b> - the 05/17/2014 at 10:19pm<b>Already_Dead</b> - the 04/13/2014 at 8:53pm<b>starlight300</b> - the 11/27/2013 at 5:35pm<b>stripes97</b> - the 07/22/2013 at 3:30am<b>LilGonzo99</b> - the 07/21/2013 at 3:03pm<b>rachaelward</b> - the 07/21/2013 at 5:00am<b>waffule365</b> - the 04/27/2013 at 1:48am

Fucked!<b>TopiaryOwl</b> - the 11/04/2014 at 7:08am<b>juststephhere</b> - the 10/12/2014 at 7:58pm

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zerstinick's favorite FMLs

Today, I was about to have sex with my girlfriend for the first time. Just as she took her shirt off, her phone rang. It was her mom demanding she return home. Now I've been cockblocked, and my girlfriend's mom seems to be a god damn clairvoyant. Awesome. FML

by Anonymous / 10/27/2011 at 10:49pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend and I were about to have sex. He passionately laid me down onto the bed, both of us fully naked. Pressing down on my shoulder, he ended up dislocating it. The pain made me pee myself. FML

by Darcy / 10/26/2011 at 2:58am / Australia (Victoria) / Intimacy

Today, my parents got rid of our detachable shower head. Looks like I'm single again. FML

by sad / 10/25/2011 at 6:15am / Reserved / Intimacy

Today, while at my job as a hostess, I was seating a couple and their adorable little girl. I tried to ask how old she was, but what came out was, "Aww, what breed is she?" FML

by Anonymous / 10/21/2011 at 5:27pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Work

Today, I had sex with my boyfriend for the first time. After we finished, he went under the covers and started touching me. At first I thought he was trying to give me "oral pleasure". It turns out he lost the condom inside of me and was trying to fish it out before I noticed. FML

Today, after having had sex with my girlfriend for the first time the night before, she went to the doctor. He said she's still physically a virgin. FML

by Mini-wanker / 10/18/2011 at 1:34pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, I realized that due to my anti-depressants, I can no longer orgasm. At. All. Which depresses me more. FML

by Anonymous / 09/29/2011 at 5:46am / United States / Intimacy

 Today, my mom is marrying my ex boyfriend's dad. The same ex boyfriend who I caught cheating on me with my sister. Family gatherings are going to be such a joy! FML

by AL / 09/21/2011 at 1:53am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, six years after hurricane Katrina took everything from me, I received a letter in the mail from FEMA telling me that I have to repay them the money I received to replace what was lost. I have 30 days to repay $4,900 or the case will be sent into federal debt collection. FML

by fiendishkitty / 09/20/2011 at 1:53pm / United States (Texas) / Money

Today, I realized that the place that my brothers and I would find soggy balloons and blow them up when we were younger is where the prostitutes take their clients. We were blowing up used condoms for a good part of our childhood. FML

by IbetIgotAIDS / 09/12/2011 at 12:15pm / United States (Kentucky) / Intimacy

Today, I decided to formally introduce my girlfriend to my parents. My dad took the opportunity to apologize for walking in on us a few days ago while we were having sex. It wasn't her. Thanks dad. FML

by Anonymous / 09/10/2011 at 2:35am / United States / Intimacy

Today, I went to Walmart with my Dad, and he decided to kick me in the butt while I was walking. When I went to kick him back, I hit my own leg out from beneath myself and landed on my face. The most embarrassing thing was that the people who saw all started clapping. FML

by Krystyn Gareau / 09/09/2011 at 12:10am / Canada (Saskatchewan) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to Walmart with my Dad, and he decided to kick me in the butt while I was walking. When I went to kick him back, I hit my own leg out from beneath myself and landed on my face. The most embarrassing thing was that the people who saw all started clapping. FML

by Krystyn Gareau / 09/09/2011 at 12:10am / Canada (Saskatchewan) / Miscellaneous

Today, my dad told me I'm no longer allowed to see my boyfriend. Apparently there is a deer camera above my driveway that snaps pictures whenever it senses movement. Too bad I didn't know that when I was giving my boyfriend head in the driveway. FML

by Username / 08/31/2011 at 3:36am / United States / Intimacy

Today, I was fired because a 10-year-old shat his pants and couldn't follow directions. FML

by dck128 / 08/29/2011 at 6:05pm / United States (Tennessee) / Work