ysrhael

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ysrhael

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 14584
  • Number of comments : 184
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 10 posted

About ysrhael : Hi, I'm 18, going to law school, love music, love reading. I'm 6'5" tall, message me, you know you want to ;)

ysrhael's page activity

Visits<b>ragnarok1540</b> - the 07/08/2016 at 9:07pm<b>Gooddrark</b> - the 05/08/2016 at 11:55am<b>kiteskatie</b> - the 03/07/2016 at 1:53am<b>andrmac</b> - the 02/27/2016 at 12:36pm<b>Iwtumn</b> - the 02/12/2016 at 5:02pm<b>CLOTHESPlN</b> - the 12/07/2015 at 12:12am<b>player20270</b> - the 12/06/2015 at 2:55pm<b>Envy22</b> - the 10/25/2015 at 10:09pm<b>Stephaniepeach</b> - the 10/06/2015 at 4:56pm<b>ksbrdkntr</b> - the 10/06/2015 at 10:57am<b>shanekicksass</b> - the 09/01/2015 at 12:27am<b>raven83</b> - the 04/09/2015 at 9:21am<b>katjas</b> - the 04/02/2015 at 5:41pm<b>bonbon2020</b> - the 02/27/2015 at 10:13pm<b>codyflanders2008</b> - the 02/03/2015 at 3:00am<b>cowboyroy45</b> - the 12/17/2014 at 8:55pm<b>jordi55</b> - the 12/17/2014 at 5:53am<b>Star1398</b> - the 12/01/2014 at 5:48pm

Fucked!<b>Envy22</b> - the 10/26/2015 at 3:09am

ysrhael's FML badges

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

See all of ysrhael's badges

ysrhael's favorite FMLs

Today, I woke up to my 5-year-old standing over me with a pillow. I asked him what he was doing, and he replied that he and Steve were playing a game, but Steve said I have to be asleep for it. Steve is my son's imaginary friend. I'm convinced Steve wants to kill me. FML

by DrtySnchez / 08/18/2013 at 5:37am / United States (Georgia) / Kids

Today, my husband finally returned from his 18-month deployment. Sexually starved, we wasted no time getting busy. Later as we finally cooled off, I got a message from my Aunt. She was hiding in our closet the whole time to surprise us with cake for his safe return. FML

by jgtrflynn / 06/24/2013 at 12:37am / United States (Oklahoma) / Intimacy

Today, I won an argument against a sexist co-worker. When I left later on, I jumped into my car to drive home, but managed to reverse it into a parked excavator. Guess who's going to hear virginal jokes about women drivers from now on. FML

by fuck the man-dominated construction business / 06/19/2013 at 12:18pm / Finland (Southern Finland) / Work

Today, after discovering that our son is already sexually active, I asked my husband to have a talk with him. "Remember, son, it's all about the clit", wasn't what I had in mind. FML

by Anonymous / 06/08/2013 at 6:34am / United States (Alabama) / Intimacy

Today, my wife uttered the soul-crushing words, "But we're married now, why would we have sex?" FML

by ._. / 06/04/2013 at 8:08pm / United Kingdom (Bedfordshire) / Intimacy

Today, I got a text message while driving home. I checked after arriving, and found it was a kinky text from my boyfriend, so I sent him an even kinkier reply. He later raged at me, because I somehow should have known he was showing off his phone to his mom when I sent my reply. FML

by i'm not psychic, mother fucker / 06/02/2013 at 4:48pm / Sweden (Uppsala Lan) / Intimacy

Today, I discovered that my 20-year-old son has been using my bras for his jerk-off sessions. FML

by Kay / 06/02/2013 at 3:00pm / India (Andhra Pradesh) / Intimacy

Today, I found out that my parents were artists when they met. My mom said that I was one of their best projects yet. My sister, hearing what my mother said, broke my week-old PS3 in a rage. FML

by H1dd3n / 06/01/2013 at 7:31pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was making love to my fiancée, when she dug her nails into my back and told me to "choke" her like I did last night. I was at work last night. FML

by Anonymous / 06/01/2013 at 3:51am / United States (Oregon) / Intimacy

Today, I went to the pharmacy to buy condoms. My card was declined, and I had to stand and watch in morbid fascination as the man behind me kindly paid for my purchase. His reason was "God forbid a maxed out Visa should get in the way of fucking." FML

by Samprib / 06/01/2013 at 1:09am / United States (Indiana) / Intimacy

Today, a few freshmen jumped my fence. They decided to take a dip in the pool, so I pulled out a paintball gun. I unloaded over 100 rounds, painting their backs bright yellow. It also dyed my pool yellow, and it'll apparently cost around $500 to repair. FML

by pool party / 05/28/2013 at 8:48pm / United States (Illinois) / Money

Today, while at the beach, my son needed to pee. I told him to pee in the ocean. He took off his pants and peed from the beach to the water. FML

by Anonymous / 05/28/2013 at 7:01pm / United States (Texas) / Kids

Today, I was sending intimate pictures to my girlfriend and accidentally sent one to my best friend. He sent me one back. FML

by Abrams52 / 05/28/2013 at 1:44am / United States (Indiana) / Intimacy

Today, my in-laws came for dinner. My 5-year-old son chose that as the perfect time to say, "Good girls always swallow!" when my daughter coughed up some of her food. I have no idea where he heard it, but my mother-in-law blamed me, and my wife had to convince her not to call CPS on me. FML

by Anonymous / 05/27/2013 at 6:15pm / United States (Utah) / Kids

Today, a man asked about fishing in the river which flows beside where I work. I said you could, but anything you caught under 5 inches has to be thrown back. His wife then said, "Wish I knew that before I married him." I started to laugh. The man almost cried and complained to my boss. FML

by Anonymous / 05/26/2013 at 8:40pm / United Kingdom (South Ayrshire) / Work