Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

yoimtrollin

Offline (3 hours ago) | Search for a member

yoimtrollin

5Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 19 February 1998 (17 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 4782
  • Number of comments : 45
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About yoimtrollin : You're looking at my profile now.

yoimtrollin's page activity

Visits<b>Jiratias</b> - the 07/12/2015 at 10:42am<b>limabean235</b> - the 07/03/2015 at 4:49pm<b>de_ehlluminati</b> - the 06/15/2015 at 2:13pm<b>ilovedogs24</b> - the 06/11/2015 at 12:53pm<b>Toughsky</b> - the 05/17/2015 at 1:24pm<b>dakatabg</b> - the 05/14/2015 at 8:55pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/03/2015 at 5:38pm<b>prthundergod</b> - the 04/02/2015 at 11:25pm<b>WaltzingPhanthom</b> - the 03/30/2015 at 11:22pm<b>BlackStar288</b> - the 12/24/2014 at 12:41pm<b>ThatOneGirl2020</b> - the 10/31/2014 at 10:50pm<b>cocainewhore</b> - the 10/12/2014 at 4:52am<b>Demig0d6</b> - the 09/16/2014 at 12:04pm<b>DutchRogue</b> - the 09/16/2014 at 1:46am<b>garage</b> - the 09/15/2014 at 11:32pm<b>testtest2</b> - the 09/15/2014 at 6:50pm<b>cwrocker</b> - the 09/01/2014 at 2:40pm<b>Corvo_Attano</b> - the 08/11/2014 at 11:12pm

Fucked!<b>de_ehlluminati</b> - the 06/15/2015 at 8:14pm<b>dakatabg</b> - the 05/15/2015 at 2:55am<b>prthundergod</b> - the 04/03/2015 at 5:25am<b>WaltzingPhanthom</b> - the 03/31/2015 at 5:22am<b>ThatOneGirl2020</b> - the 11/01/2014 at 3:50am

yoimtrollin's FML badges

Back from a party

An FML submitted on a Saturday morning between 5 and 6am can't be a good FML.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of yoimtrollin's badges

yoimtrollin's favorite FMLs

Today, I met the most beautiful girl I've ever seen on the beach. I was nervous, but I just smiled and said, "Hey, you're really pretty." Then I let out a horrific fart. FML

#20816798
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51830) - you deserved it (11080)

On 08/02/2013 at 9:58am - misc - by YouSoSmelly (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, a customer pulled a knife on me after I informed him that we'd run out of avocados to put on his pizza. FML

#20815101
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48561) - you deserved it (3529)

On 08/01/2013 at 11:18am - work - by are these people even HUMAN? (man) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, my girlfriend of 3 weeks gave me an ultimatum: marry her, or she kills herself. FML

#20814794
340 comments

I agree, your life sucks (69937) - you deserved it (6008)

On 08/01/2013 at 3:36am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, while taking a walk in the forest, someone approached me and asked to borrow the knife I had clipped to my pocket. I happily obliged, assuming he just needed it as a tool. Instead, he used the knife to mug me, taking my cellphone and my wallet. I was robbed with my own knife. FML

Today, my 10-year-old son told my 5-year-old daughter that we're a ghost family, and told her to run through our glass door to see for herself. She believed it, ran straight into the door, and ended up having to be taken to hospital. FML

#20813979
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54769) - you deserved it (5265)

On 07/31/2013 at 7:19pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Falkirk)

Today, I did a photoshoot with my boyfriend and his buddy. We drove out to the countryside and set up on top of a hill. My boyfriend kept having me move further and further back. I eventually fell and rolled down the steep hill, while he and his buddy high-fived each other. FML

#20808454
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47774) - you deserved it (6970)

On 07/28/2013 at 6:58pm - misc - by -_- (woman) - United Kingdom (Birmingham)

Today, I was finally asked out on a date after a year of being single. Turns out he got the wrong number. FML

#20799037
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44648) - you deserved it (3163)

On 07/23/2013 at 5:51am - love - by foreveralone (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, my doctor told me that I suffer from orgasm migraines. Basically, I get an intense migraine that lasts for hours after I have an orgasm. FML

#20798770
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67924) - you deserved it (4012)

On 07/23/2013 at 1:17am - intimacy - by amanda (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I was at the park playing Frisbee with my friends, when I saw a boy sitting on a bench looking rather sad. "Hey!" I yelled, and he looked up at me. I lightly threw the Frisbee in his direction, and it hit him in the face. He was blind. FML

#20788974
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54911) - you deserved it (17103)

On 07/17/2013 at 7:15pm - kids - by WasntMe - United States

Today, I was doing stand-up comedy at open mic. The guy I like started laughing, but before I hit my punch line. Apparently, when I was speaking, I was occasionally spitting, and in the very bright light it was easy to see my spit hitting people in the face. They kept a tally. FML

#20787970
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44959) - you deserved it (6246)

On 07/17/2013 at 6:06am - love - by sucker and suckatash/say don't spray - United States (Hawaii)

Today, my boyfriend dumped me. His reason was that my laugh is really annoying and makes him want to "stick a baby in a blender". FML

#20786622
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46099) - you deserved it (9015)

On 07/16/2013 at 4:32pm - love - by ... cheers (woman) - United Kingdom (Renfrewshire)

Today, I suddenly started having excruciating pain. My husband took me to the ER, where I waited for three hours in agony to be seen. By the time a doctor got to me, the pain had mostly gone, but it was found to be a kidney stone. I was told, "Next time, don't wait so long." Really? FML

Today, I woke up to a strange noise. I looked over to see my drunk husband standing at the dresser. I asked him what he was doing. "Peeing." I asked him, "In the sock drawer?" There was a pause. "Am I peeing in the wrong drawer?" FML

#20779714
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52831) - you deserved it (4354)

On 07/13/2013 at 10:32am - misc - by speechless - United States (Indiana)

Today, I was going to fight the guy who my girlfriend left me for. While waiting at the park, he sent me a video of the two of them having sex on my bed. FML

#20768398
236 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66006) - you deserved it (21465)

On 07/07/2013 at 8:35am - love - by SimG (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, at the doctor's, I had lots of papers to fill out so my boyfriend offered to help. We submitted them and the doctor called me a few minutes later. Under disorders my boyfriend had written, "Major cock craving disorder." The doctor couldn't stop giggling. FML

#20763013
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61957) - you deserved it (11607)

On 07/04/2013 at 3:03am - intimacy - by Never Going Back To The Doctor (woman) - United States



FML's blog

  • Auntie Bernie replies #1
  • Hello all you crybabies, from Land's End to John o' Groats. Yes, I'm finally here my lovelies. Since last week, my inbox hasn't stopped humming with the noise of new mail dropping into it, letters full…

Friday 31 July 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: