Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

yoimtrollin

Offline (yesterday at 6:13am) | Search for a member

yoimtrollin

5Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 19 February 1998 (17 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 5556
  • Number of comments : 45
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About yoimtrollin : You are currently viewing my profile.

yoimtrollin's page activity

Visits<b>ladyofdeath13</b> - the 08/10/2015 at 3:23am<b>Jiratias</b> - the 07/12/2015 at 10:42am<b>limabean235</b> - the 07/03/2015 at 4:49pm<b>de_ehlluminati</b> - the 06/15/2015 at 2:13pm<b>ilovedogs24</b> - the 06/11/2015 at 12:53pm<b>Toughsky</b> - the 05/17/2015 at 1:24pm<b>dakatabg</b> - the 05/14/2015 at 8:55pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/03/2015 at 5:38pm<b>prthundergod</b> - the 04/02/2015 at 11:25pm<b>WaltzingPhanthom</b> - the 03/30/2015 at 11:22pm<b>BlackStar288</b> - the 12/24/2014 at 12:41pm<b>ThatOneGirl2020</b> - the 10/31/2014 at 10:50pm<b>cocainewhore</b> - the 10/12/2014 at 4:52am<b>Demig0d6</b> - the 09/16/2014 at 12:04pm<b>DutchRogue</b> - the 09/16/2014 at 1:46am<b>garage</b> - the 09/15/2014 at 11:32pm<b>testtest2</b> - the 09/15/2014 at 6:50pm<b>cwrocker</b> - the 09/01/2014 at 2:40pm

Fucked!<b>de_ehlluminati</b> - the 06/15/2015 at 8:14pm<b>dakatabg</b> - the 05/15/2015 at 2:55am<b>prthundergod</b> - the 04/03/2015 at 5:25am<b>WaltzingPhanthom</b> - the 03/31/2015 at 5:22am<b>ThatOneGirl2020</b> - the 11/01/2014 at 3:50am

yoimtrollin's FML badges

Back from a party

An FML submitted on a Saturday morning between 5 and 6am can't be a good FML.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of yoimtrollin's badges

yoimtrollin's favorite FMLs

Today, I got nominated to sit in a chair in the middle of the gym during a high school rally while the entire school got to throw paper balls at me. FML

#20979287
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44302) - you deserved it (4514)

On 12/03/2013 at 11:34am - misc - by reallyhighschool (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my boss's obese bully of a grandson had a seizure. Being the only physician around, I had to rush in to tend to him. Except it wasn't a seizure as such. My daughter had found my taser and used it on him. FML

#20971381
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48818) - you deserved it (5115)

On 11/26/2013 at 2:05pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I got a concussion. It was when an entire shelf of bicycle helmets tumbled onto my skull. FML

#20954433
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40562) - you deserved it (3003)

On 11/11/2013 at 9:14pm - health - by myheadhurts (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, as always, my boyfriend has the ability to pop his eyeballs out of his eye sockets. He thought it'd be funny for me to wake up face-to-face with the disgusting sight. The shit in my bowels did an early Thanksgiving Day parade straight into my underwear. FML

#20952990
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44588) - you deserved it (4065)

On 11/10/2013 at 6:27pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, as my wife and I were getting intimate, I thought I would try a little "dirty talk". I whispered in her ear that I would "dick her down good". She couldn't stop laughing. FML

#20946325
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29004) - you deserved it (56995)

On 11/05/2013 at 10:26am - intimacy - by Something I said? (man) - United States (New York)

Today, while teaching juniors about black holes, I said, "Imagine everything being sucked into a black hole." An African-American student shouted, "I'd better start clenching!" Nobody took the lesson seriously after that. FML

#20946225
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46719) - you deserved it (5645)

On 11/05/2013 at 8:22am - work - by regretsteachinghighschool - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I got knocked over at the park by a rampant dog. My fiancé stood by laughing his ass off as I repeatedly tried to stand up, only to be knocked back down again. I'm seven months pregnant. FML

#20943386
203 comments

I agree, your life sucks (71623) - you deserved it (4971)

On 11/03/2013 at 2:21am - love - by StrandedWhale (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I found out that my husband told his mom that she can move in with us once his time in the army is over. We are moving into my house, and he didn't think it was important to run it by me first. FML

Today, I found out that my girlfriend has been sleeping around. After telling my best friend, I also found out that he and a few others have known for the past month. He asked, shocked, "Dude, I thought you knew?" FML

#20933837
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46736) - you deserved it (3802)

On 10/25/2013 at 7:55pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, my mother came over to visit, and my kids started excitedly telling her Christmas is coming soon. She freaked out, saying Christmas is a "Satanic holiday" and telling them that Santa is going to hell along with everyone who celebrates it. My children are now traumatized. FML

#20933801
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44794) - you deserved it (3565)

On 10/25/2013 at 7:20pm - kids - by Jane M (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I took my girlfriend to meet my parents at a family dinner. There was plenty of alcohol on offer, as is normal at our get-togethers. She got blind drunk and ended up crying to my mum about how I can't please her because I have a small penis and my oral sucks. FML

#20933730
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58226) - you deserved it (9914)

On 10/25/2013 at 6:08pm - intimacy - by Dick the Greater (man) -

Today, my surgeon was talking to me about my upcoming heart bypass operation. I was extremely nervous from the start, but he somehow managed to keep saying things like "death", "fatalities", "high-risk", and "never wake up" throughout. FML

#20925456
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41410) - you deserved it (3367)

On 10/18/2013 at 6:12pm - health - by DocBastard, meet DocCunt (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my husband yelled from upstairs, "Babe! BABE, COME QUICK!" Terrified that something might have happened to our newborn daughter, I rushed up, only to find out he just wanted to show me that he'd learned how to spin a top on the tip of his penis without it falling. FML

#20908628
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53449) - you deserved it (7174)

On 10/05/2013 at 5:28pm - intimacy - by -____- (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I accidentally texted a picture of my cock to my dad. FML

#20907559
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28488) - you deserved it (83325)

On 10/04/2013 at 7:36pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)



Maïté Verjux's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Auntie Bernie delivers in 2016
  • Greetings my young friends! It's 2016 and I'm late. No, I'm not pregnant, I'm way too old for that sort of thing, even though I've been trying a lot recently (hey there Didier, you randy rascal…

Friday 5 February 2016

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: