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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 19 April 1986 (29 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 573
  • Number of comments : 29
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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yamuri's favorite FMLs

Today, my three-year-old nephew chose to jump out of a window and break his arm rather than be babysat by me. FML


I agree, your life sucks (28004) - you deserved it (4192)

On 04/29/2015 at 6:44pm - kids - by Winxy (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I learned that before you tell a blonde joke, you should make sure that your high school's 6'8", 275-pound, blond quarterback isn't standing behind you. FML

Today, I was escorted out of a grocery store for beating my boyfriend with a block of cheese. FML

Today, my house was broken into. After we called the police, my dad started calling himself Sherlock Holmes and talking in a British accent. He insists on calling me Watson. He is going around the neighborhood acting like Sherlock, investigating stuff. He won't stop. FML

Today, I sprayed down some ants in my house. In the sea of ant corpses was a single living ant seemingly cradling a dead one in its arms. I'm convinced I just became the villain in an epic tragedy. Now I have to live with my ant problem because I can't bear to tear another family apart. FML


I agree, your life sucks (51611) - you deserved it (24931)

On 08/07/2013 at 1:40am - animals - by Blood on my hands (woman) - United States

Today, I dislocated my shoulder. I was screaming and writhing in pain, and my eyes were shut for most of the ride to the hospital. We stopped, and I was thrilled because I thought we were at the ER. I was wrong. My dad had stopped to order a cheeseburger. FML


I agree, your life sucks (59258) - you deserved it (4658)

On 08/06/2013 at 12:11am - health - by mcdonalds - United States

Today, after learning that my wife has been cheating on me, I decided to distract myself by playing The Sims. Not long after I began, my Sim's wife basically started cheating on him. FML


I agree, your life sucks (57763) - you deserved it (6076)

On 08/02/2013 at 1:03am - love - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, one of my employees filed a complaint against me. He claims that I "pick on him" and make him do things I "wouldn't do". Apparently, making him do his job and trying to convince him to wear clean clothes that don't smell like garbage is considered a bad thing. FML


I agree, your life sucks (51601) - you deserved it (4451)

On 07/31/2013 at 10:15am - work - by Zatnikatel (man) - United States (Kansas)

Today, it's my fifth wedding anniversary. My wife bailed on the romantic dinner that I arranged in favor of running off with her friends. Their big event: an amateur Fight Club event they'd decided to stage in an abandoned parking lot. FML


I agree, your life sucks (44717) - you deserved it (4161)

On 07/19/2013 at 12:41pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my boyfriend and I were out cliff jumping, when for the first time, he told me he loved me. I panicked and pushed him over the edge and into the water. He's now in hospital. FML


I agree, your life sucks (31815) - you deserved it (70338)

On 07/08/2013 at 1:27pm - love - by Erica (woman) - United States (California)

Today, while at my job as a hairdresser, I was giving an elderly client a perm and I thought she'd fallen asleep. She'd died. FML


I agree, your life sucks (51377) - you deserved it (2234)

On 10/05/2012 at 1:49am - work - by Anonymous - United States

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  • Eni's illustrated FML
  • Greetings worshipers of lines and colours! This week, with the help of a talented young illustrator we’re checking kids out. No, not like that. Damn, that sounded bad. We’re taking a different look a…

Friday 12 February 2016

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